Winner and Sunday Funny

Carly Icon

So sorry for the two people who saw this post live on Saturday. I had an “oops” moment and put in the wrong date. Julie fixed it for me!

The winner of the HOT PROPERTY ARC, Monkey bookmark and Key Toppers:

# 96 - Georganna

email me at: carlyphillips @ mac.com (no spaces) with your mailing address to claim your prize!

**********

And now for the funny:

This is why women should not take men shopping against their will.

DON’T TAKE ME IF I DON’T WANT TO GO………..

After Mr. and Mrs. Fenton retired, Mrs. Fenton insisted her
husband accompany her on her trips to Wal-Mart.

Unfortunately, Mr. Fenton was like most men–he found shopping
boring and preferred to get in and get out.

Equally unfortunately, Mrs. Fenton was like most women–she
loved to browse. One day Mrs. Fenton received the following letter from
her local Wal-Mart.

Dear Mrs. Fenton,

Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a
commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and may be
forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against Mr.
Fenton are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance
cameras.

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in
people’s carts when they weren’t looking.

2 . July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at
5-minute intervals.

3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to
the women’s restroom.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official
voice, “Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away.”

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of
M&M’s on layaway.

6. September 14: Moved a “CAUTION - WET FLOOR” sign to a
carpeted area.

7. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and
told other shoppers he’d invite them in if they would bring pillows and
blankets from the bedding department.

8. September 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he
began crying and screamed, “Why can’t you people just leave me alone?”

9. October 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it
as a mirror while he picked his nose.

10. November 10: While handling guns in the hunting department,
he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

11. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while
loudly humming the “Mission Impossible” theme.

12. December 6: In the auto department, he practiced his
“Madonna look” by using different sizes of funnels.

13. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed
through, yelled “PICK ME! PICK ME!”

14. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud
speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed “OH NO! IT’S THOSE
VOICES AGAIN!”

And last, but not least

15. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited
awhile, then yelled very loudly, “Hey! There’s no toilet paper in here!”

Regards,
Wal-Mart

19 Comments »

  1. Always loved this joke

    I am now confused I thought today was Saturday and for the winner all I see is The winner of the HOT PROPERTY ARC, Monkey bookmark and Key Toppers: # XX - XXXX XXXX

    Hugssss
    LindaH

    Comment by ReadingIsSoMuchFun — April 12, 2008 @ 7:02 am

  2. LOL Great joke!
    Nice prank you pulled on us

    Comment by Bunny — April 12, 2008 @ 7:50 am

  3. I love the joke

    Comment by Kate — April 13, 2008 @ 8:54 am

  4. My husband is recently retired and actually insists on going shopping with me. Heck, he loves to go shopping on his own, while I’m the one who sometimes has to be dragged along.

    He once did something similar to Item 2–got a bunch of noisy toys going in the toy department.

    Comment by Karen Lingefelt — April 13, 2008 @ 8:55 am

  5. Great joke!

    Have a wonderful Sunday all. Looking forward to the blogs for Anniversary week.

    Cher

    Comment by Cher — April 13, 2008 @ 9:14 am

  6. WOW! I’m so excited to be the winner this week! Can’t wait to read the ARC of Hot Property. Have a great anniversary week!

    Comment by Georganna — April 13, 2008 @ 9:21 am

  7. Oops! Forgot to say a big “THANK YOU”!!!! in the last post.

    Comment by Georganna — April 13, 2008 @ 9:22 am

  8. Congrats Georganna!

    Great funny Carly!

    Enjoy the rest of the weekend everyone!

    Comment by Carolyn A. — April 13, 2008 @ 9:28 am

  9. This is why I don’t let my hubby retire, and he is well past the age to do so!!

    My father would do the same thing, Karen. We didn’t let him go shopping any more either.

    Comment by ev — April 13, 2008 @ 10:02 am

  10. whoo hoo, Georgiana…

    Comment by katie — April 13, 2008 @ 10:20 am

  11. Congrats Georganna!

    Love they funny Carly!!!

    Happy 2nd Anniversary to the Plotmonkeys!

    Comment by Liza — April 13, 2008 @ 11:56 am

  12. ENJOYED THE JOKE–IF YOU CAN CALL IT A JOKE–PROBABLY THE
    TRUTH. COURSE GUESS IT COULD HAVE BEEN WORSE, HE COULD
    HAVE PUT A LOT OF THINGS IN A BUGGY THAT YOU COULD NEVER
    USE, CHECK THEM OUT, LEAVE THE STORE, AND THEN GO BACK
    IN WITH THEM AND SAID MY WIFE WONT LET ME HAVE THESE
    THINGS.
    ALICE IN TEXAS

    Comment by ALICE — April 13, 2008 @ 1:27 pm

  13. Wtg, Georganna!
    Cute joke.

    Comment by Estella — April 13, 2008 @ 3:20 pm

  14. Lucky Georganna! Great gift!

    Love, the Sunday funny! Have seen it numerous times but I still laugh! #1 makes me laugh, can you imagine!!!

    Have a wonderful Sunday everyone.

    Comment by Donna M — April 13, 2008 @ 3:33 pm

  15. Congrats Georganna…

    Carly, this is hilarious…a must share…poor guy must have been going out of his mind to do all that stuff…he definitely figured out how to take care of his boredom…thanks for the laugh…ttyl

    Peace and love,
    Paula R.

    Comment by Paula R. — April 13, 2008 @ 4:52 pm

  16. The Anniversary is tomorrow, right?

    Peace and love,
    Paula R.

    Comment by Paula R. — April 13, 2008 @ 4:53 pm

  17. Hilarious! Thanks so much for the funny! And congrats, Georganna! Yay!

    Comment by Fedora — April 13, 2008 @ 5:13 pm

  18. Congrats Georganna

    This is my birthday and it’s too funny:
    December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited
    awhile, then yelled very loudly, “Hey! There’s no toilet paper in here!”

    Comment by Dina — April 13, 2008 @ 6:32 pm

  19. Cute joke! I think he must go to my WalMart…there have been some really odd things going on there.

    Congrats Georganna!!

    Comment by Janet H — April 14, 2008 @ 6:15 pm

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