Saturday Craft
Okay, there’s no guest blogger. I’m falling down on the job, I know. But with the holidays (including my daughter’s birthday), I just didn’t have time to line anyone up. So for today, I’m going to do a little mini lesson myself.
Last week, I was reading the most excellent book, BOY’S LIFE by Robert MacCammon. I wrote a review for the Dear Author website extoling the book’s many virtues, the strongest of which is its imagery.
Not to put on my former English teacher hat or anything (okay, maybe a visor) but I love imagery. The succint use of images created with words can evoke strong emotional responses in readers. Writing without imagery, which includes metaphors and similes, is like taking a photograph without paying attention to the lighting. With just the right light, a well-taken photo can explode with emotions. Without that light, it’s just a snapshot.
Metaphors and similes, for those of you who want a quick review, are comparisons. Similes oftentimes use the word “is” (or a form of it) and the word “like”. Imagine your hero has gray eyes. You might use a simile like this one:
His eyes were like storm clouds.
Okay, it’s a bit cliche, but there’s a comparison that evokes emotion. You wouldn’t–or at least, shouldn’t–use this simile when the character is having a great time, happy go lucky. The storm clouds are more than just about color. They are about the emotion behind the image. That’s what makes a simile so powerful.
A metaphor, to me, is a like simile, but better. A metaphor does not say that one thing is “like” the other, but that it actually is the thing it is being compared to.
His eyes were twin storm clouds.
or better:
The twin storm clouds that were his eyes swept her into a maelstrom of need.
Aha! My favorite kind of metaphor…the extended metaphor. It’s where you take the comparison and you run with it for a while. A few sentences.
The twin storm clouds that were his eyes swept her into a maelstrom of need. She flung her arms around his neck and the moment their lips met, lightning flashed behind her eyelids. Desire sucked her into a vortex that she knew she could not escape from–even if she wanted to.
Now, these are off the cuff, so I’m not putting them up as examples of anything fresh, but you get the idea.
Unfortunately, metaphors and similes do need to be fresh. So many have become cliche, because they’re good, but you can’t be lazy. There will be no “limpid pools” to describe a heroine’s eyes.
In fact, though I used my example with the hero’s eyes, I’ve found that staying away from metaphors in physical descriptions, particularly initial ones, is probably a good idea.
Another good idea is that the context of your simile or metaphor should spring from the character whose point of view you are in. I think the metaphor I used above might be even more evocative if the heroine is a hurricane chaser, don’t you? I mean, if she’s a lawyer, for instance, the metaphor doesn’t have the same power to not only give a strong description, but also to reveal character.
So, today’s short lesson amounts to this:
Use similes, metaphors and the occasional extended metaphor to add a layer of richness to your writing.
Use similies, metaphors and the occasional extended metaphor sparingly.
Be fresh and not cliche, or else, give the cliche a fresh twist.
Make sure your comparisons reflect on the point of view character so it can do double duty–evoking an image and revealing something about the character’s frame of reference.
Anyone have anything to add? To ask?
Is that first picture not incredible? My dad sent that to me in an e-mail and I immediately saved it so I could go back and look at if from time to time. I just love it.
Okay, back to topic, which it’s actually perfect that I started off the way I did because I’m finding that I have one huge problem with my writing. Way back, when I first decided I wanted to write, I started reading everything I could get my hands on. And one of the first books I read was, “Make Every Word Count.” A great old book, but for me it’s been too stifling.
I took a workshop in Dec. and the point was to keep writing through the holidays so I had to submit 2500 words each Monday to be critiqued. What kept coming back was, “more information here,” and “what is going on around them. What’s the light look like, the breeeze,” etc. etc.
I talk so much and tend to ramble (as I’m sure you’ve noticed in posts like this one)
so in my writing I try to “make every word count” and not get carried away with description, whether flat out or in similies and metaphors. I have such a hard time knowing when it’s enough and when it’s too much.
How do you know? Is it better to go with too much and then let a CP or editor tell you you’ve gone overboard? This subject is perfect timing for me so I’m very thankful you put your visor on!
Comment by Jodie — January 5, 2008 @ 10:37 am
Jodie, this is a really good question. I think the answer, however, is hard to define. The answer is organic because each author uses more or less description than another. Carly, for instance, is a very sparse writer. She uses only the amounts of description she needs and “makes every word count.” (BTW, I’ve not only read with that book, but I taught with it once!) I, on the other hand, write much more description, so much so that I sometimes have to take some of it out.
I think that you have to write the way you write and it’s okay if you don’t use a lot, but if you layer your writing (the process of going back after you’ve written to add in the nuance, like with similes and metaphors) you can add in just enough to give your writing some punch.
I took a poetry class once that taught me two things. One, I’m a horrible poet. Two, a few words can go a long way. There’s nothing wrong with being a sparse writer so long as you make those words count. And one simile can go a long way if its a good one.
So I guess my answer is that you have to find your own voice and critiquing, IMO, is one way to do this. If people are telling you over and over the same thing, then you need to listen. However, if you’re turning in work for critique on the first draft, then don’t be surprised if you get those kind of comments…I would, too! I don’t layer in a lot of the fancy elements until after I’ve written and I’m going back to do revision.
Does that help?
Comment by Julie Leto — January 5, 2008 @ 10:44 am
I learned most of what I know (ha!) about using metaphor and simile from Stephen King. He’s stunningly good at it. Also, there’s a book called Word Painting by Rebecca McClanahan that is brilliant, and should be in every writer’s library, if you ask me.
Comment by Jo Leigh — January 5, 2008 @ 12:30 pm
Yeah, that helped, but it wasn’t what I wanted to hear!
Just kidding. I don’t know why I keep finding myself in these careers that consist mostly of gray area. When I was in advertising I would get so frustrated trying to find the magic formula that nobody else had come up with yet.
Hubby could never understand because his business is so black and white, and then regulated by law, there is no gray area at all. I guess since I’m not terribly good at following rules it’s better for me to be in careers with undefined “boundaries”, but it’s still very frustrating.
Thanks for the insight and since I’m editing today I’ll play around with all this and see what I come up with. Thanks so much for being here and giving such great insight and knowledge!!!!
Comment by Jodie — January 5, 2008 @ 12:37 pm
Stephen King is great. I also really enjoy JR Ward for the same reason. Sometimes I just sit there with my mouth open and think, “How did she come up with that?” Janet Evanovich too.
Maybe Word Painting would help balance out Make Every Word Count! I’ll check it out right now.
Comment by Jodie — January 5, 2008 @ 12:39 pm
I have Word Painting, but have yet to read it. That’s part of my problem. I buy these great books, start reading them, and then don’t finish. It was the same way in school. I am the type of person who wants to hear it audible and see it as well. Ugh! I guess I should pull out the book and work my way through it.
I love JR Ward and the way she writes. I’m right there with you on her writing and the times I’ve said where did she get that or this.
Comment by Vicki — January 5, 2008 @ 12:59 pm
Yes, Jo, I agree–Stephen King is wonderful. I do often read a sentence and then think, “Wow, that’s so cool, how did he think to put it in just that way?”
Comment by Leslie — January 5, 2008 @ 1:12 pm
That first picture is awesome! It reminds me of a line from the movie, Out of Africa–”…the African new moon lying on her back…”
Great lesson today, Julie. Thank you! We do really need to remember to write “fresh” which takes extra effort but is so worth it.
Hope everyone has a terrific day,
Cher
Comment by Cher — January 5, 2008 @ 1:35 pm
Jodie, I never tell people what they want to hear!
Honestly, the gray area of writing carries over well to the gray area of publishing, so it’s good practice. No one knows what works and what doesn’t until they see it. It’s very annoying, but the way it is.
I love Stephen King, but I can’t read his books. He’s scares me to death. That’s how I know how good he is! But I regularly read his column in Entertainment Weekly. I think the man is brilliant.
Comment by Julie Leto — January 5, 2008 @ 2:23 pm
Oh, that first picture is a sunset at the North Pole.
Comment by Julie Leto — January 5, 2008 @ 2:24 pm
Hi Julie,
Even though I have no desire to write I love checking out Saturday’s blog. My awe of authors and their talents continues to grow the more I read about writing a book. I love that there are so many talented authors that write books I can read! My tastes keep that to a somewhat small list! Depending on what you think is small!!!
Thank you for sharing that beautiful picture with us and thanks for letting us know it is at the North Pole, cause I was wondering! Actually I love the picture of the clouds also, black & white pictures can be so dramatic. My ex is a photographer which gave me an appreciate for photographs.
Everyone have a great weekend.
Comment by Donna M — January 5, 2008 @ 3:24 pm
Hi Julie,
I was in the neighborhood today–hi! I read your writing article and really liked your statement: Writing without imagery, which includes metaphors and similes, is like taking a photograph without paying attention to the lighting.
Wish I’d checked in for your workshop with Erica Orloff–one of my fave writers! I need to drop by the Plot Monkeys more often.
Wishing you and everyone a great 2008, “coco”
Comment by Colleen Collins — January 5, 2008 @ 3:40 pm
Hi, Julie! I swear, if I was a writer, you guys would help me so much!
Comment by Wendy — January 5, 2008 @ 8:12 pm
Great blog, Julie!
Comment by Estella — January 5, 2008 @ 8:17 pm
I’m so pleased that the non-writers enjoy these blog posts…I really appreciate you all posting.
Coco! You do need to drop by more often…Jo, too!
Comment by Julie Leto — January 5, 2008 @ 10:26 pm
What is an extended metaphor?
Comment by Pat L. — January 6, 2008 @ 1:49 am
Pat, if you go back into the blog, you’ll see the example of the extended metaphor. It’s a metaphor that goes on longer than one sentence…the comparison is drawn out for a paragraph or so.
It can also mean when an author keeps returning to certain imagery throughout a piece of fiction or poetry.
Comment by Julie Leto — January 6, 2008 @ 10:34 am