I Forgot to Blog!
The bad news? I forgot to blog. 
The good news? It’s because I’ve been busy writing! 
I’ve also been busy getting my holiday gifts together because when you send things to business people, you have to take the long holiday season into account. Businesses close, have odd hours, and shut down for parties. 
Because I forgot to blog, I’m going to give you a holiday funny. And of course, a question we can talk about today too. 
******************
:candycane: Christmas Party Planning Breakdown :candycane:
FROM: Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All Employees
DATE: 4th November
RE: Christmas Party
I’m happy to inform you that the company Christmas Party will take
place on December 23rd, starting at noon in the private function room at the
Grill House. There will be a cash bar and plenty of drinks!
We’ll have a small band playing traditional carols…please feel free
to sing along.
And don’t be surprised if the Managing Director shows up dressed as
Santa Claus! A Christmas tree will be lit at 1.00p.m.
Exchange of gifts among employees can be done at that time; however,
no gift should be over $10.00 to make the giving of gifts easy for
everyone’s pockets.
This gathering is only for employees!
The Managing Director will make
a special announcement at the Party.
Merry Christmas to you and your Family.
Pauline
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
FROM: Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All Employees
DATE: 5th November
RE: Holiday Party
In no way was yesterday’s memo intended to exclude our Jewish
employees.
We recognize that Chanukah is an important holiday, which often
coincides with Christmas, though unfortunately not this year. However, from now
on we’re calling it our ‘Holiday Party.’ The same policy applies to any
other employees who are not Christians. There will be no Christmas
tree or Christmas carols sung. We will have other types of music for your
enjoyment.
Happy now?
Happy Holidays to you and your family,
Pauline.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
FROM; Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All Employees
DATE: 6th November
RE: Holiday Party
Regarding the note I received from a member of Alcoholics Anonymous
requesting a non-drinking table…you didn’t sign your name. I’m happy
to accommodate this request, but if I put a sign on a table that reads,
“AA Only,” you wouldn’t be anonymous anymore!!!! How am I supposed to
handle this? Somebody?
Forget about the gift exchange, no gift exchange allowed now since the
Union Officials feel that $10.00 is too much money and Management
believe $10.00 is a little cheap.
NO GIFT EXCHANGE WILL BE ALLOWED.
Pauline.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
FROM: Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All Employees
DATE: 7th November
RE: Holiday Party
What a diverse group we are! I had no idea that December 20th begins
the Muslim holy month of Ramadan, which forbids eating and drinking during
daylight hours. There goes the party! Seriously, we can ! appreciate
how a luncheon at this time of year does not accommodate our Muslim
employees’ beliefs, perhaps the Grill House can hold off on serving your meal
until the end of the party - or else package everything up for you to take
home in a little foil doggy bag. Will that work?
Meanwhile, I’ve arranged for members of Weight Watchers to sit
farthest from the dessert buffet and pregnant women will get the table closest
to the toilets, Gays are allowed to sit with each other, Lesbians do not
have to sit with gay men, each will have their own table.
Yes, there will be flower arrangements for the gay men’s table, too.
To the person asking permission to cross dress - no cross dressing
allowed. And No, no blow-up sheep.
We will have booster seats for short people. Low fat food will be
available for those on a diet. We cannot control the salt used in the
food. We suggest those people with high blood pressure taste the food
first. There will be fresh fruits as dessert for Diabetics, the
restaurant cannot supply “No Sugar” desserts. Sorry!
Did I miss anything?!?!?!?!?!
Pauline.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
FROM: Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All F****** Employees
DATE: 8 November
RE: The ******** Holiday Party.
Vegetarian pricks I’ve had it with you people!!! We’re going to keep
this party at the Grill House whether you like it or not, so you can sit
quietly at the table furthest from the “grill of death”, as you so
quaintly put it. You’ll get your f****** salad bar, including organic
tomatoes, but you know tomatoes have feeling, too. They scream when
you slice them. I’ve heard them scream. I’m hearing them scream right
NOW!!
Hope you all have a rotten holiday * drink, drive, and die!
The Bitch from HELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
FROM: John Bishop - Acting Human Resources Director
DATE: 9th November
RE:
Pauline Lewis and Holiday Party
I’m sure I speak for all of us in wishing Pauline Lewis a speedy
recovery, and I’ll continue to forward your cards to her.
In the meantime, Management has decided to cancel our Holiday Party
and instead, give everyone the afternoon of the 23rd December off with
full pay.
**********************
What’s your favorite part of the holiday season? Is it the parties? Is it the giving? The getting? The songs? The decorations in the malls and lawns? The crowds in the stores? The sales? Mine is the FEELING I get from all the above. The warm, fuzzy, happy feeling! Ok I also like the giving. And the getting. Do tell! 
Funny, Carly! Sad, too…we’re so PC these days.
Drives me nuts.
What do I love about the holidays? Well, I hate shopping, so that’s out. I think it’s the decorations on the houses in my neighborhood…and getting together with my family. I love giving gifts…I just hate the act of buying them. I need a personal shopper! I love all the TV specials and movies, too.
I hope I haven’t missed the
one yet! They always play it so early! And yes, we have it on video, but it’s not the same…besides, our VCR isn’t working so we can’t watch any of our Christmas stuff…we need to convert it all to DVD!
Comment by Julie Leto — November 26, 2007 @ 7:36 am
I love to get, but since so few actually listen or care about what I like, I prefer giving. why? because I do listen and have seldom heard anyone ask for a reciept to return something. Makes me feel even better when they get it wrong. I still have to hide something from last year, still in the bag, that someone gave me. Regift else where maybe?? hmmmm….
I am almost done with my shopping. We started our employees 40% sale yesterday, and I have been stockpiling for a while. Wait until hubby gets the credit card bill. I think I will becareful when cyber shopping today.
Comment by ev — November 26, 2007 @ 7:41 am
Julie-
was on this weekend, Friday I think. 
Comment by ev — November 26, 2007 @ 7:43 am
Carly, the funny was good. I think I’ve read it before, but it was still good.
About the holidays, I like everything but the shopping. I absolutely HATE to shop. I don’t mind if I know what I want and where I want to get it, but other than that, I hate to shop. I do love all the lights on the houses, and I have a tendency to go way overboard with that. LOL My son says you can see our house from a mile away. I also like the giving part. Our son is 20 and really needs nothing. Everyyear a local radio station does a week long event where they collect toys for tots, and everyyear I take $200 and go shopping for that. It’s great to shop for kids, and especially for ones that don’t have anything. This giving makes me feel great everytime I do it.
Julie,
and his buds will be on Tuesday night at 8 on ABC, I saw it advertised the other night while watching Women’s Murder Club, so you didn’t miss it yet. I absolutely have to watch that everyyear, and I hope you didn’t miss Charlie Brown Thanksgiving last Tuesday. It’s classic when they make toast and popcorn for dinner. 
Well, everyone have a good day and take care!!!! :elf:
Comment by Kathy — November 26, 2007 @ 9:23 am
Shopping during the holidays is like being in the middle of a very scary movie. Luckily I try and go a bit earlier when it’s not so crazy.
I love the decorations, the music (though not 2 months of Christmas tunes), the anticipation. I love giving gifts, and (hopefully) making someone else’s holiday a little brighter. It’s just a magical time :wreath:
Comment by Stacy ~ — November 26, 2007 @ 10:05 am
Ev - I feel just like you do about the getting part. I hate to be ungrateful, but nobody ever listens to me. My MIL always, always, always give me something that has to be drycleaned. What’s the problem? I live in jeans and sweatshirts…where am I going to where something that needs to be drycleaned?
My SIL came running up to me the other day squeeling, “I got your Christmas present today and it looks just like you.” I about choked myself holding back the groan. They don’t really see me, they see the way they would like me to be and they aren’t even in the same catalog!
But enough grumbling…I love the feeling of Christmas. I feel good, especially at the beginning of the season before everyone get’s grumpy and stressed. People say “hi” more easily, they hold doors going in and out of stores, we do a lot of shopping for families that hubby’s Kiwanis Club adopt and I love doing that for them. And I really, really love the Grinch!!!
Comment by Jodie — November 26, 2007 @ 10:18 am
hey Carly,
Great funny.
That happens when you try to satisfy anybody. LOL
I
everything about Christmas. Just talking about it already makes me feel like living in a peaceful world where no trouble exists (that’s why I love this subject). 
But on on the Christmas day itself, I love the atmosphere when your whole family is there, singing carols and sitting round the 
mastree:. Honestly, I’m not that into presents. ( although I have to admit that without 
, it would be a little bit boring). As for the shopping: when I already know which presents people want it’s no problem for me. But when I don’t know what they would like it’s terrible 
Carly, glad to hear that you’re busy writing ( Even if it means that you have less time to spent on the blog) I’m looking forward to your next release like crazy. And more writing
means more reading for me. 
Take care all and have a great week
See you
Vero
Comment by Vero — November 26, 2007 @ 10:25 am
The good news for me is that Hanukkah is early this year and so I HAVE to be finished by Dec. 5. Every year I set Hanukkah as my deadline for ALL gifts which means I’ll have EVERYTHING finished soon. As it is, I’m very close! Just my daughter Jen … she’s the last shopping I have to do.
Comment by Carly — November 26, 2007 @ 10:29 am
Carly,
Lucky you. You’ve almost finished. I still have a horribly long list to buy. And on my lists, there aren’t any certain presents, there are only names which means I still have to wait for great ideas to come what I could buy. Hope these will come soon.
So I admire anyone who has already bought presents and those who have finished. WTG, folks.
Keep on shopping.
Vero
Comment by Vero — November 26, 2007 @ 10:52 am
Good morning plotmonkeys and everyone,
Love the funny, Carly. The world has gotten so PC these days. They don’t even call bank Tellers “Tellers” anymore they’re called something else which I can’t even think of at the moment.
What I love about the holidays–I love the decorations and the music. Especially the old/new holiday tunes like “So this is Christmas” by the Beatles and “Merry Christmas Darling” from the Carpenters and “Another Auld Lang Sine” by Dan Fogelberg and …Well you get the idea.
I love sitting with my family and looking at the tree and the lights on the mantel And I love thinking about New Years and what I want to accomplish in the coming year.
Have a great day all,
Cher
mastree:
Comment by Cher — November 26, 2007 @ 11:02 am
I love Christmas lights — on someone else’s house.
They look so pretty, and I know how much work it is to get it done. We’ve never put lights on our house, so I think that’s why I admire them so much on others. I also love the cooler weather (for California), and the giving. I love to give presents!
Funny story regarding Xmas lights. When my oldest daughter was about six or so, we were out driving through the neighborhood looking at all the pretty lights on all the houses (except ours, LOL), and my daughter starting getting really upset. When we asked her what was wrong, she said, “If our house doesn’t have any Christmas lights on it, how is Santa going to find it when it’s so dark?”
We told her we’d leave the porch light on for him, which seemed to satisfy her somewhat, LOL.
Another time my youngest daughter Kellie asked how Santa got into someone’s house if they didn’t have a chimney — and we told her that Rudolphs nose was magic, and all he had to do was touch it to the front door knob and it would unlock for him.
Ahhh, the innocent of Christmas! That’s one of the things I miss, too. :santahat:
Comment by Janelle — November 26, 2007 @ 11:31 am
I had a friend sent me that joke because I’m in HR and I do all of the employee appreciation events for our organization.
I pretty much love everything about Christmas. I start listening to Christmas Carols early, then there’s all the holiday movies on TV, the Salvation Army bells (I always donate to them), the decorations, the lights, etc., etc.
Comment by Dev — November 26, 2007 @ 11:39 am
My favorite part of the season… all of the above works for me, but I really like riding around at night looking at Christmas lights in all the neighborhoods. That really gets me in the Christmas mood.
Comment by Shannon Upright — November 26, 2007 @ 11:54 am
LOL Carly, that was a funny, funny. We celebrate both Hanukkah and Christmas. My favorite thing about Hanukkah (besides the giving) is the latkes. I can taste them already! Yum. I don’t care that my house smells for days, they are sooo good. My favorite thing about Christmas is being with family and friends. And I love that my 9 year old still believes in the magic of Santa.
Comment by Robin — November 26, 2007 @ 11:56 am
My favorite part of the holidays is the elementary school Christmas concert. It doesn’t matter how much of a Scrooge I am when I go in, I’m always full of holiday spirit when I leave.
Comment by Darlene — November 26, 2007 @ 1:05 pm
I love everything about Christmas. Christmas was my mom’s favorite holiday, so it’s always been a really big deal to me. I still remember asking how Santa would get into our house since our chimney was sealed up. My mom told me that Santa had a magic key that could open anyone’s front door(I was only 6 or 7 at the time). I especially love the extra time I get to spend with my family for the holidays. This year, for the first time in a few years my brother will be home for Christmas. He does have to fly home on Christmas night, but we get 5 days together before he leaves.
Comment by Liza — November 26, 2007 @ 1:26 pm
Great funny, and unfortunately soooo true. My favorite part of the holidays is the shopping, and the baking. :santahat: If I should happen to sample the baking, just to make sure everything turned out okay, that’s just more fun for me.
Comment by Kelly H — November 26, 2007 @ 2:43 pm
The funny is priceless & sorry to say much to true! When did we have to start accomodating all these different beliefs!!
I love Christmas, I wish the kindness & thoughtfulness people show would last all year. The music, I love listening to old & new Christmas music. My favorite song for the last couple of year is Michael Buble’s song “Grown-Up Christmas List”
mastree: The decorations are wonderful to see. I love baking cookies or other goodies for people for Christmas and being with family & friends. :santahat:
Comment by Donna M — November 26, 2007 @ 3:32 pm
I must also tell you, last year, it was so awesome…my oldest (with autism) was the ONLY one of them who was dying to see Santa and he did the best job. The other two clammed up or screamed. Just goes to show, you never know with him!
Comment by katie — November 26, 2007 @ 3:48 pm
Janelle - you made me think about the year we gave our oldest son a Barbie doll
He was at the age where he was beginning to question things so we stuck a Barbie doll in his stocking with our neighbor’s daughter’s name on it. He was convinced for another couple of years because, obviously, we wouldn’t have done such a thing so Santa must have gotten confused! 
Comment by Jodie — November 26, 2007 @ 3:50 pm
Too funny!
My favorite part of the holidays is getting together with family.
Comment by Estella — November 26, 2007 @ 4:28 pm
Very funny Carly!
Janelle, I’ll have to remember the rudolph nose to door knob trick.
Jodie, Very creative thinking that one up.
Me, I’m a giver. I love to shop, especially for toys.
Zoey here, I like having so many people to play with.
Take for example Thanksgiving :feast:
I went to meet Little King Leo a sphinx cat.
Dang, that guy stalked me all day.
He might be younger but he is bigger than me.
I ate too many leftovers and got lots of attention too.
Now so far Christmas is another story. It seems
there’s a lot of shopping involved which means;
I am spending more time home alone in my crate.
I sure hope that huge bag from petsmart is for me and not Leo.
I guess I’ll use this next month wisely and rest up for the
family affairs. Have a great holiday everyone.
Comment by jeannie & Zoey — November 26, 2007 @ 4:49 pm
I love the music and the pretty Christmas themed windows at the departments stores. Can’t forget the gifts, they’re important too.
Comment by Jane — November 26, 2007 @ 4:55 pm
I love the feeling of Christmas. The sights and the sounds are pretty wonderful, too. I loved the funny about the “Holiday ” party. I can tell you that it’s not that far off base. I work with about 100 people and we have narrowed our celebration to a “Holiday Luncheon”. We must strive to be politically correct. But I still say “MERRY CHRISTMAS”!!!
mastree:
Comment by Carol R — November 26, 2007 @ 5:20 pm
Plotmonkeys- HELP! Is anyone else sending a box of goodies to a soldier from the radio station in Missouri’s list? I am in Miami-can we ship to Iraq?
I am mega confused.
I too am pleased you are writting again. Mazel Tov! Kisses to all 
Leslie, my son’s birthday is today and we celebrate Hannukka(my side) and X-mas(Dad’s side), so my deadline is usually right before kiddos b-day to have all shopping done. I was thinking of not wrapping anything this year, just dumping stuff in a big pile, and saying” Guess!”
Comment by Sue Mont — November 26, 2007 @ 5:22 pm
Sue, so long as you have a IPO address or military address, yes, you can ship there from anywhere in the States.
Comment by Julie Leto — November 26, 2007 @ 6:51 pm
Carly love the funny
I am with you Carol R to pc and I say MERRY CHRISTMAS
mastree:
I LOVE
mastree: my tree went up Friday and the lights on the outside.
I like houses that are decorated. I just drove by my brother’s house because my sister in law said their house looked like the Griswolds
I like the Christmas songs I love it all
:candycane: :elf: :santahat: :stocking: :wreath:
mastree:
Comment by Cherylann — November 26, 2007 @ 8:23 pm
Jodie, that was a good one!
Comment by Janelle — November 26, 2007 @ 8:36 pm
I really love it all. This is one of my favorite holidays and yes since I work the day job I do try to make sure I remember the different holidays being celebrated during this time of the year. For my home it’s Christmas though.
I loved the funny…it made me laugh. I work in it everyday. So very true.
Now for a few icons. :wreath:
mastree: :stocking:
Comment by Vicki — November 27, 2007 @ 4:34 pm