Celebrating!!!!!
My husband wouldn’t let me post this until the last out at Midnight …
WORLD SERIES BOUND!
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You should note the original title was Celebrating our Failures but after the Red Sox victory, I changed it to just Celebrating!!!! (Yes I’m a METS fan, but I’m also a Red Sox fan being married to a Bostonian, so this is a VERY good day in our house!)
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And now back to our regularly scheduled programming …
HOW DO WE FIT IT ALL IN?
Seriously. As wives, as mothers, as working women, as full time writers, as part time writers, as stay at home moms, as working moms, as students, as partners, as single women with a job . . . whatever category or categories you fall into (not to mention whichever categories I inadvertently forgot to mention), how do we fit everything into a day or even a week?
The answer is obvious, at least to me. WE DON’T. And at some point in our lives I suspect we’ve all made peace with that notion. At least I hope you have. If not, maybe now’s the time. Stop beating yourself up for what you haven’t done and congratulate yourself for what you have accomplished.
To make you all feel better, I’m going to list five things that rarely get done (and I am serious here):
1. Cooking Dinner - very very rarely if at all. No time! BAD ME! 
2. Cleaning the House – I see the dust accumulating on top of the window sills so that’s going to have to change! DOUBLE BAD ME!
3. My office is piled high again with papers and junk – bills and filing aren’t happening. TRIPLE BAD ME!
4. Diet - My pants are snug and the weight I lost last year is coming back on – Need to focus more on eating less. QUADROUPLE BAD ME!
5. Exercise – I hate hate hate it. I will do anything to avoid it but my cholesterol is high and my doctor says I must do something cardio-wise. I’ve let that go for way too long. QUINTUPLE BAD ME!
OUCH! That was a nasty list of my faults and failures. 
To make myself feel better, I’m going to list five things that DO get done and make slacking in the first list okay:
1. My husband, my girls and I sit down as a family and eat dinner most nights of the week so we can catch up on everyone’s day. It might be rushed, it always is take out, but it’s 99% of the time healthy (Turkey sandwiches; wraps; salads; roasted chicken from the supermarket). YEAH ME. 
2. Communicating with my family – I am a master at driving all over town and while I’m doing that, I have my girls in the car going to various appointments and activities, and we can talk. My girls talk to me about enough things for me to think, “I’m doing the very best that I can for them.” DOUBLE YEAH ME!
3. Writing is happening again! OK not in huge spurts but thanks to Sven’s challenge, I’m writing in steady spurts. Not as much as I’d like but enough to motivate me to write more almost every day. TRIPLE YEAH ME because I do have deadlines! I also feel better when I am writing!
4. I may be eating too much again, but I’ve learned how to lose and what is good for me to eat and what is not. Now I just need to remind myself to eat less of it. QUADROUPLE YEAH ME because with knowledge is power. Now I must zip mouth closed portion-wise.
5. I’ve started exercising 3 days a week for twenty minutes on the treadmill. Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday mornings I promised myself that when the kids walk out the door for school at 7 AM I will go downstairs and walk/run. I accomplished this last week. I intend to accomplish it again this week. One day at a time. QUINTUPLE YEAH ME because I want to see my children and my children’s children grow up.
So you see, I’m a slacker in many areas. Cleaning, diet, exercise, and even writing. But I’ve decided I shouldn’t kick myself for what I don’t get done, rather celebrate what I do. And so should you!
Is there anything in particular you slack on? If so what? And how can you turn it into a positive?
(For those of us with significant others, any chance we can make THEM see the good in what we don’t do? 
Great post Carly, and yes, we shouldn’t feel guilty for the things we don’t get done when there are many more that do get accomplished, and usually the more important things, such as spending quality time with family. Cleaning will always be around, but family might not be. We have to think about the things that are truly important to us.
Thank you for such an inspirational post :pumpkin:
Comment by Stacy ~ — October 22, 2007 @ 6:55 am
Cleaning is my biggest slack around here. And the holidays are coming up!
Which means I will get all the cardio I need by rushing around here cleaning like a maniac- doing all the stuff I let go after last Christmas! :cursing:
I am always of the opinion that reading or watching tv or shopping or who-knows-what-else is more important to do during my days off than actual work.
I did get the gazebo down (almost anyway) and the outside furniture put away this weekend. Now to find a tall grandson to help with the rest of it.
Exercise is even harder than cleaning. I suppose I could combine the two on a more regular basis. Nah, forget it.
I am however considering strangling the new kitten for breaking my glasses. Now I can’t even read until I get them fixed.
Comment by ev — October 22, 2007 @ 8:03 am
Lately, writing is what I have been slacking on. I spend six days a week running my kids everywhere, that when I get home I’m to tired or lazy to do any thing that will involve my head.
However, the upside of not writing on my down time is that I have been watching football. Lots and lots of football.
Oh yeah, I like Carly sit down to dinner everynight with my husband and kids and sometimes its even homemade food. 
Comment by Patty L. — October 22, 2007 @ 8:19 am
Patty, have you considered the 70 Days of Sweat with Sven? It JUST started last week and you can jump in any time and honestly it’s what is getting and keeping me writing! Some of our bloggers are doing it, Julie’s doing it …
The Rules: http://70daysofsweat.com/wordpress/archives/71
The daily blog: http://70daysofsweat.com/wordpress/
It’s a great motivator for me.
I just think that we’re so hard on ourselves, sometimes we need to look at what we accomplish not what we don’t!
Comment by Carly — October 22, 2007 @ 8:29 am
Exercise and cleaning are the big things I let go. I’m single, so it isn’t even to take care of anyone but me. I just love to read and watch tv when I get home from work. I am doing a better job about eating healthier, but still have to exercise to get the weight off. I’m going to go for the 20 minutes 3 days a week. I know I can get on my bike right when I get home from work and ride for 20 minutes while watching tv or listening to my ipod.
Comment by Liza — October 22, 2007 @ 8:41 am
YAY SOX!!! I am dragging today because I as up watching the game but it was sooooo worth it. Plus I am sure the rest of Massachusetts is in the sane boat. LOL!
Carly, this post is really great for me because three weeks ago I rentered the work world. I have a 3 year old that I stayed home with and now I am working again. It is SO hard because when I get home I just want to spend time with her. Not worry about cleaning or laundry etc. What I sometimes do is wait for her to go to bed then run around the house like a nut trying to catch up on household chores.
As for cooking, I have a crockpot or slow cooker as some people call them. This has been an amazing asset. I through everything in there an turn it on before I leave for work in the morning. When I come home it is all done. It’s awesome!
Thanks for the post and reminding me that we are human, and the important thing is to spend time with your family. The cleaning and cooking isn’t high on the list of things that need to be done. Especially when I can be running around with my daughter before she hits the teenage years and doesn’t want to hang out with me. LOL!!
Comment by Kelly F. — October 22, 2007 @ 9:21 am
Carly: This exact post could have been written by me (everything word for word). We don’t really sit down as a family to eat, but I do spend time with each of my boys and husband individually. I know, studies show that kids who eat dinner as a family are not on drugs, but I do spend time with them individually, daily, does that count!?
My house is a mess, but I would rather spend time with my boys than clean.
Comment by katie — October 22, 2007 @ 9:25 am
Ok first, WOOOOOOOOT RED SOX!!!
World Series, here we come!
LOL. Hubby stayed up to watching the whole thing, but I had to call it quits at 11:20.
But yes, having grown up in NH and living in MA with a native Bostonian, life it pretty darn good in our household today. :-D
Comment by Kate Scott — October 22, 2007 @ 9:29 am
>>Especially when I can be running around with my daughter before she hits the teenage years and doesn’t want to hang out with me.<<
Oh, Kelly, you hit that nail right on the head. It goes SO fast…eh Janelle?
And Carly, my list is very close to yours–the messy house, the delays in the writing, the WEIGHT. ARGH! But I am trying harder on that, I’m focusing more on the writing, I do sit down with my family every night for dinner.
The cleaning? Well….I have to clean for the party this weekend :vampire: , so that should count, right? (At least until Sunday morning when it’s a complete disaster area! ) :ghost:
Comment by Leslie — October 22, 2007 @ 9:31 am
PS:YAY on the Sox! My Dad is a Bostonian and has rooted for them all his life. He’s also a baseball player…at 75, he just made it onto the St. Pete, FL all over 75 league. It’s so funny to hear him talk about how all these 80-85 year olds call him “rookie” and run circles around him on the field!
Comment by Leslie — October 22, 2007 @ 9:32 am
Ditto for me, Carly. Those are all my weaknesses, too.
Katie — Me and my family don’t sit down at a table for dinner most of the time, and I’m 99.9% sure that my two girls who are 15 & 17 aren’t doing drugs (they are such homebodies!
). But I do talk to them individually on a daily basis, to see how their day was, if anything happened that they need to talk about, homework, etc. So, I don’t believe the theory that you have to sit down at dinner with the entire family in order to have good kids. I think good parenting equals good kids! 
Comment by Janelle — October 22, 2007 @ 9:34 am
I’m kinda going to extremes by actually selling my house to downsize into something smaller in order to alleviate some of the stuff I never get done. Seriously. Between writing and the day job, I’ve got too much on my hands to deal with a big house that this family of three are swimming around in. So I’ve kinda gone with Plan B. Instead of forgiving myself and not taking care of some things, I’m just eliminating some stuff from the list entirely. And actually, I’m pretty excited about finding a life I can live more simply.
Comment by Lori Borrill — October 22, 2007 @ 9:47 am
Kelly, when you look back in life, will you remember cleaning or spending time with your family? That’s what counts. NOT that we shouldn’t clean, LOL, but it isn’t the end of the world if we do more important things and catch up later. Also, Janelle, the dinner with the family is my way of us all checking in with each other b/c otherwise, nobody would lift their heads from their computers or TV’s etc. It’s just what works for us! Les, your dad is GREAT! Too cool.
Comment by Carly — October 22, 2007 @ 9:50 am
Great post Carly. Good to know that others dislike cleaning, dieting & exercise just like me. I do cook for my family even though I don’t like it. I’m getting better at it. I prefer baking - love those baked goods, hence the dieting and exercise needed!
Did I say it already… GO RED SOX!!!
Comment by Carolyn A. — October 22, 2007 @ 10:45 am
For the most part, we do sit down together and have dinner at least five times a week…perhaps all seven days, though I certainly don’t cook all seven days! But that’s just because we can, so we do. I only have one child, which makes it a bit easier!
Growing up, we pretty much ate dinner together on most nights…but only because my grandmother lived with us and she did all the cooking. My mom worked. Later, after my grandmother died, I took up a lot of the slack and we still had dinner. My mom also does cook. But many of our meals were eaten at the ball field, since all three of my brothers played.
I won’t get excited about the World Series until the day the Cubs make it in. Or the Rays…and I’m not likely to see either in my lifetime.
My house? Not clean. I don’t even want to talk or think about my weight. I’m going back to writing!
Comment by Julie Leto — October 22, 2007 @ 10:46 am
Okay I’m not too bad on the cooking and cleaning. I make dinner M-F and the house probably gets cleaned every two weeks, so I don’t feel guilty about that.
My biggies are diet and exercise. I just can’t seem to find the motivation to make better food choices. Hopefully someday soon.
Comment by Kelly H — October 22, 2007 @ 10:54 am
Great post, Carly. I used to REALLY beat myself up for a ship load of stuff. I thought of myself as a failure if I didn’t do everything perfectly. But I don’t do it anymore. Of course it took 3 years of therapy for me to stop. :giggle:
The things I do well are exercise because it is a priority. I do 45 minutes on the treadmill at least 6 days a week. I eat a healthy diet. I keep the house in order by doing a little bit each day instead of all in one big swoop. It makes my life a heck of a lot easier.
My office until about 2 weeks ago looked as though something had exploded but I re-did the storage closet off my office, painted, put up shelving etc. so a lot of stuff that used to be cluttering up my office is neatly stored in there now. Of course it took about 3 weeks to make this happen.
I used to REALLY stress because I let bills and bank statements pile up until my husband suggested that I pay the bills and balance the statements as they come in. I do that now and my stress has greatly reduced. There is still a huge amount of clutter on the bar where all our “stuff” collects–receipts, Lilly’s school stuff, my husband’s work stuff…I still haven’t figured out a system for that yet.
I’ve learned not to sweat the small stuff. I’m a good, kind and compassionate person. I’m also loyal to a fault, a steadfast friend no matter what is happening, I’m a great mother and a wonderful wife. No brag just fact. So, I give myself high marks just for showing up as a decent human being.
I’m also a pretty darn good writer.
Here’s the key to controlling cholesterol: A few years ago my husband’s cholesterol was 280 and his triglycerides were 310 and climbing. A friend of his suggested this and now we both partake every day. My husband’s cholesterol is now 170 to 175 and mine is 157!
The secret…drum roll….SOLUBLE FIBER FORMULA MADE BY YERBA PRIMA. We get it at a local vitamin/health food store. Their web site is http://www.yerba.com The directions are on the bottle. It’s all natural and works like a charm. It’s like a scrub brush for your arteries.
My husband tried the cholesterol drugs first and ended up having surgery because of them. DON’T DO THE DRUGS!
One more thing: YAY COLORADO ROCKIES!!!! WOO HOO!!! THE FIRST TIME IN FRANCHISE HISTORY WE ARE GOING TO THE WORLD SERIES!!!
YAHOO!!!
Have a great day all,
Cher
Comment by Cher — October 22, 2007 @ 11:00 am
Weight would be the worst for me. I’m slowly gaining weight…again. I know what I should and shouldn’t eat but when life gets crazy and busy I don’t take the time to eat correctly.
I don’t clean much during the week but on the weekends I try to take care of it. Science Guy helps some and that’s great!
Also, I’m giving away a copy of Witchy Business this week on my blog.
Comment by Vicki — October 22, 2007 @ 11:32 am
Janelle: I still feel guilty about not eating together. It’s getting worse, too. We have to start the bath routine earlier now (we have to have them into bed earlier because they have to wake up earlier to get the bus). Hubby isn’t usually home when we all eat (we all sort of eat at different times because of our different schedules and graze for the evening meal), then hubby comes home for the last hour and a half before lights out. It is going to get worse when his office moves in December, too (he’s going to get home later). I do ‘check in’ with each of them daily.
I always have something to feel guilty about. Wish me luck today…I have been ’summoned’ by my oldest’s teacher. Before then, I am off to the pumpkin patch with #2 and hubby is making sure #3 gets to preschool and gets picked up. WHEW. This is crazy day.
Comment by katie — October 22, 2007 @ 11:55 am
Comment by Elisa V — October 22, 2007 @ 11:56 am
I need to do the diet/exercise, and the cleaning …
Comment by Yolanda — October 22, 2007 @ 12:59 pm
Yeah Red Sox.
I have to say that I am a NY Met fan too, but when I came to Boston for college and met my future husband I made a deal that I would cheer 
for the red sox. So far it has worked out. Now if the Mets had gotten to the World Series all bets would have been off.
I totally understand the failings thing. Right now I am a stay at home mom with a two year old and a four month old. I am in school on Saturdays and I do a home business. Oh, and my husband travels so is gone from monday at 5am to Friday at 5pm. I feel like I am never getting anything done. When I can both of the kids to sleep for either a nap or bedtime I veg.
I have stopped listening to some of the snide comments that come from my in-laws. (If they don’t like it they can come and take the kids for a while).
Diet thing I am working on. Still have 30 pounds to go before I am back at my weight before my first pregnancy. Exercise I get that from running around after my two year old, but I am trying to get back into running too.
Can’t weight for Wed. going to veg with the world series, if I don’t fall asleep first.
Comment by Jen Hall — October 22, 2007 @ 1:22 pm
i need want indians to win. boo.
Comment by kim h — October 22, 2007 @ 2:15 pm
I am a die hard Florida Marlins Fan and a dedicated fan of the NL but I am very happy for the Red Docks just ‘cuz they are so very emeshed in baseball history. I also thought it was very interesting that two eapansion teams competed for the NL penant( the Diamond Backs and the Rockies).
I suffer from fibromyalagia so my bad me list would be that
1. I am cranljk more than I would like
2. I can not clean as much as I would like because if I sweep or vacume I am in bed for 3 days! (and not in a good way)
3. I lost 44 lbs on weight watchers 5 years ago and I have put it ALL back on
4. I would like to be more active but it hurts, so I sometimes avoid even easy things as I am terrified of injuring myself more.
Good stuff….
My 16 year old son Devin and I have a good relationship. We talk a lot and we enjoy each others sense of humor.
2. I walk the dog every day in the afternoon so I do get some excersise and I enjoy watching Leyla ( the dog) frolick.
3. I do cook at least 2-35times a week when I can and we always eat together except when we don’t! Sometimes I can’t eat right away but I sit at the table and we talk about our day.
4. My husband and son like to play computer or Playstation together . Amazon and I do our very best to get good deals and bargins.
5. I read a lot and this is something I love to do and I make time for. My cat ( it was my son’s but he GAVE him to me last year) and I hang out together and I find that very relaxing. He seems to really like the Plot Monkey books because he is always parking himself on them!
Comment by Sue Mont — October 22, 2007 @ 2:28 pm
Red Socks. Red Socks . Red Socks.
#5- I do not spell check as much as I should!
Comment by Sue Mont — October 22, 2007 @ 2:30 pm
Carly, a good subject for the day. Since I hate housework my place is in terrible shape. I’m the only one here to make the clutter, now if I could just find the ambition to get it cleaned up!! Cooking is one of my favorite things but after so many years alone it is not a lot of fun to cook for myself. I depend to much on packaged foods but do cook from scratch when I am in the mood & I love to bake but don’t need the calories!! I usually walk 5 days a week except when it is raining. It is a habit I started long ago and I enjoy it. My small town tends toward interesting houses with nice yards so it is a pleasure to get out to walk. I usually walk a different way everyday so it doesn’t get boring.
Good thing the series is starting out in Boston as it snowed in Denver, our paper says they have about 7 inches of snow! Brr—the Rockies had to practice inside! My oldest daughter & her family lived in Colorado for about 8 1/2 years so they are all very excited that the Rockies made the play-offs & are going to the World Series! GO ROCKIES!! :pray:
By the way, GO ROCKIES!
Comment by Donna M — October 22, 2007 @ 2:41 pm
GO BO-SOX!!!!
Great post Carly.
Comment by Estella — October 22, 2007 @ 4:53 pm
Janelle: I hope you and your family are all safe from the wildfires!
Comment by katie — October 22, 2007 @ 5:24 pm
Just had to chime in as another Bosox fan… my Boston hat is attached to my head these days… maybe we’ll see it happen TWICE in our lifetime — gives me chills!
GO SOX!
Sam
Comment by Sam Hunter — October 22, 2007 @ 5:58 pm
Great Post Carly
I agree with Stacy we shouldn’t feel guilty for the things we don’t get done when there are many more that do get accomplished, and usually the more important things, such as spending quality time with family. Cleaning will always be around, but family might not be. We have to think about the things that are truly important to us.
I do let the receipts from the stores sit in my pocketbook for a
while and don’t write them into the checkbook.
Comment by Cherylann — October 22, 2007 @ 6:55 pm
Carly,
Maybe Joe will go help Willie
Comment by Cherylann — October 22, 2007 @ 6:56 pm
I like your idea of working in the positives of the week. Sometimes, it is easy to forget when things go right. Okay, some weeks the two sides are a little unbalanced. I am trying to remember what is important now and what is important for the long haul. I am also trying to learn when it is okay to laugh at the toddler and when I have to be mom. “I have to load the dishwasher” vs. “Sure, lets glue pieces of paper together”.
Comment by ThatBrunette — October 22, 2007 @ 11:06 pm
The diet thing is always a challenge so we won’t dwell on that. Like you, I’ve learned what to eat and I’m now a pretty regular AM exercise person.
Cleaning? I get the basics done. I know I’m bad when there are dust bunnies falling off the ceiling fans. :oops:
Things that don’t get done that I feel badly about:
1 — Mail birthday, other special occasion, and thank you cards so that the recipient receives them (at all, much less on time). My mother would sigh and shake her head if she knew this.
2 — Write letters or call old friends. No time for talking on phone, and I never seem to get around to those letters.
I will email and I do send e-cards. So I try.
Comment by Patricia W — October 23, 2007 @ 11:18 am