I wasn’t going to talk about Tiger Woods. Everyone is doing it. What new thing do I have to add to the discourse? Nothing fresh. Nothing new. The whole sordid thing makes me sick to my stomach. But one thing set me off yesterday and despite our vow here in the Jungle to never talk about anything controversial or hot-button…I gotta guess that just about everyone here can agree with one thing…this whole thing is horrible.
But here’s the headline that made me totally bust a few blood vessels:
ALLEGED TIGER MISTRESS ANGRY ABOUT OTHER WOMEN
I mean…they’re kidding, right?
She’s not upset about, I don’t know, the fact that he has A WIFE and two small children, but she’s got her panties in a twist because he cheated on HER?
(I never thought I’d get to use that smilie in a post…)
I have to admit that I do not understand the females who cheat with high-profile men that they know are married and then go public about it afterward. Other than a pathetic bid to garner their fifteen minutes of fame by announcing to the world that they are tramps…what’s the appeal? The money from the National Enquirer? The shots of them on the cover of Star? Do they go buy extra copies to hand out to their grandmothers at Christmas? Or are they just waiting for the big pay-out from the guy’s handlers to keep them quiet?
(For the record, I don’t understand women who go after married men in the normal, non-celebrity world, either, but that’s a whole different topic.)
No matter what their reasoning, they come off as pathetic and immoral.
I don’t think I need to expound on the man’s role in all of this, but those women were willing participants and I don’t understand the long-term motivation. I mean, a guy who cheats on his wife does so because he wants to feel like a god. That’s simple enough to understand, even if I think it’s disgusting.
But what does the woman get? Does she feel special because some famous guy wants in her pants? I mean…if she’s attractive enough to get the attention of a celebrity, I’ve got to think she gets LOTS of male attention on a regular basis. Does she do it for the money? Well, that’s illegal in most states. Does she do it for the fame? Really? THAT’S not what I’d want to be famous for. (Actually, I’d never want to be famous…contrary to popular belief, none of the writers I know actually want to be famous…it’s too much work. Most simply aspire to being popular and successful.)
Anyone have any theories on why women do this to themselves? I’d curious to hear what you all think because I’m flummoxed!
By all reports, Julie Leto was a sweet child once, somewhat shy, preferring to play quietly in her room making up stories. However, being raised with three brothers in a loud, primarily Italian household did have its influences and Julie discovered her inner tough girl. That’s probably why most of her heroines kick serious butt. Writing sassy heroines has worked out, as she’s sold nearly thirty books to three publishers featuring strong, confident women. Julie lives in Florida with her husband, daughter, spoiled dachshund, enormous guinea pig and a wide range of relatives all within driving distance.
3 Seductions and a Wedding
COLD SIGHT
Kiss Me If You Can
Wild For Him
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I do believe it’s all about the publicity. However misguided, insane, pathetic (choose your word here) it is, I think these women are just looking for their fifteen minutes. They can’t get famous any other way, so how about this one? And sometimes I think they are so removed from reality that they don’t understand how the world perceives them for what they did. It makes sense in their own head, so why should anyone else have a problem with it?
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Having an affair with a celebrity in their mind I think mays them feel, wow look who I got, not to mention gifts that are probably lavished on them.
They have no morals needless to say – if they would stop and think – but they are stupid so they don’t – how would I and my children feel if that were happening to me.
Now here is real stupid – gee if he cheats on his wife or girlfriend, ya think maybe he would do it to me? Duh! Sure would! That never occurs to them. They either think it won’t happen or they are just “enjoying” if you will the moment.
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Makes them feel meant to say, not mays. Sorry.
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An even bigger question is why do these guys continue to do it when they see so many get busted in the public eye?
What, they believe their mistress is the ONE that really won’t say anything? 
Just sayin’. 
Tami
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To answer Tami’s question – b/c I can’t FATHOM what these women are thinking – the men are so “larger than life” they begin to believe their own press. Think they are infallible. X was stupid. I’m more careful. I won’t get caught. And who would believe them over me? I’m a huge star. And the money? I think having everything with a snap – it gets them in trouble – it’s not reality. They forget they can HURT people. And beyond that – I think in Tiger’s case – I don’t want to hear “sex addiction”. I think the push to be perfect – nobody can live up to that and everyone believed Tiger was perfect. An idol. And who falls harder than those people?
All that said, I feel sorry for his wife. AND he should fire his PR people. Unless he’s the one calling the shots against their advice. Who knows. This whole situation is unbelievable and sad.
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First if all WHY would a woman be wiling to go in and break up or be part of the breakup of a family that makes them as scummy as him. He on the other hand, Why would he do that to someone whom he claims to love? That is a really crappy thing to do to the one person you have vowed before God and your family and friends to NEVER hurt.
Is 15 minutes of fame worth all the fall out? How can they look their families in the eye after it all goes public? The embarrassment alone would do most people in. And not to mention what guy is ever going to want to date her knowing that she slept with a married man then turned around and told all? Is “Mr Right” going to want to get involved with her knowing that she may be out telling all their secrets
to anyone who will listen? It is disturbing on all sides.
I can not fathom their reasoning’s on either side. Maybe that is because I would never do that to the person I love and I doubt very seriously he would either. We have too much respect for one another to do that, not to mention too much self respect and pride in who we are.
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Not to mention potential diseases he brings home to woman he supposedly loves!!!!!
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Yesterday T MZ was hounding Katie couric- who is the biggest interview -tiger or wife? Katie ignored them.
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I saw that headline yesterday too, and made me sick just to read it. I’m sorry, but there is never a good reason to cheat on someone. If you are that unhappy, get out of your relationship before moving on to someone else. Who really wants to be remembered only for being some famous person’s mistress? Seriously, if he cheats with you of course he will cheat on you.
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Soooo do not understand the mentality of the either party.
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I saw a news blurb on a local station a couple of days ago, with the talking head interviewing a researcher on male cheating. According to this fellow, 87% of men he and his team have interviewed confess they would cheat if they thought they could get away with it. Frankly, I’m surprised it wasn’t 97%.
I understand the (mostly unconscious) biological imperative that underlies all our intimate relationships. For men, that means impregnate as many viable females as possible, plain and simple. But we’re supposed to be more than biology. We’re supposed to have evolved enough that we can act with honour and integrity. Sadly, those values seems to be lacking, along with moral values. Especially with high-profile people.
And what of the women? Women who cheat on their own spouses and/or sleep with married men?
This kind of behaviour disgusts me all round. Yep, you get your 15 minutes of fame and maybe money–then you fall back into obscurity. I can’t see how destroying lives is worth it–but I’m glad I can’t grasp the mindset of people like this (either men or women).
I’d like to say that men need to stop thinking with their little heads and start thinking with their big ones, but this never will change. And always there will be grasping, manipulative, greedy women who will take whatever they can, at any cost.
Really, it’s no wonder I prefer the company of my fur family to that of most humans.
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This whole story upsets me. Tiger had a prenup that she had to stay with him for x number of years and then he cheats and he gets all boo-hooey because his wife is demanding more $$ to stay with him. Finally, I love his statement on his website….where he apologizes to his wife and then goes on (for a longer period of the statement) to aim at the press. Obviously, he does not realize that HE and HE alone caused this situation because he can’t keep his pants on. I also love how he is quoted to have said to his wife, “You ruined my Thankgiving” (look in the mirror, Buddy, now THAT is the person who ruined your Thanksgiving).
To answer your question, this is an interesting story. The one ‘girlfriend” (The NYC one who was first reported and is represented by Gloria Alread) has told her friends that she ‘is in love with him”. Okay. That’s great. Then, wait until he is no longer married. She was holding a press conference that was cancelled (to initially deny the affair). Allegedly, Tiger is paying off all of his ‘girlfriends’ to keep quiet, just like he’s paying off his wife to stay with him. As far as the girlfriend being ‘upset’. Okay, he was cheating on his wife with you, don’t cha think he’d be cheating on you?
I could go on and on. I totally agree with Carly on the diseases part (ick). And, I totally agree…if you want to cheat, get a divorce first.
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I saw this article when I was doing my news reading for the day and thought it was appropriate….
http://www.cnn.com/2009/LIVING/12/08/cheating.spouses.lawsuits/index.html
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As the ex wife of a cheater I can tell you from personal experience it is not a place you want to be in. At least my ex wasn’t famous so I didn’t have to put up with the press that his poor wife is going through. My daughter was just telling me the other day that everytime her stepmother talks about how long she has been with her dad it makes her mad because part of that time he was married to me. She said she thought that the stepmother should be ashamed but it didn’t seem to bother her. Water under the bridge for me but I hate it that it still makes her upset, she’s 27 and that happened when she was 4. I suppose now we will get to hear about Tiger for months on end. At least maybe we won’t hear about Jon and Kate for a while. I am thoroughly SICK of those two.
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lots of hugs to you, Linda.
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Patsy–that’s exactly what I have always said about cheating. It’s bad enough to cheat, but to do it on the person you have publicly proclaimed as the one you love above all others? Cheating on someone is a hurtful thing. You wouldn’t go out of your way to be intentionally hurtful to your friend, so why on earth would you do it to your spouse?
I read a blogpiece somewhere that said Tiger is the ultimate “alpha male” having to prove he’s superior to other men both in sports and in life, and that men like that just can’t stop themselves from every new conquest that comes along.
Hmm…kinda makes me think about my post of yesterday, about alpha heroes. Maybe that’s why I don’t really like them–because I can never totally and completely believe they’ll be faithful until the day they die.
As for the women–I think it comes down to power and wanting that feeling of superiority. They think “Well, he might have married her, but I AM the one he wants! IF it weren’t for the kids, he would CHOOSE to be with me, so aren’t I better than her? Haven’t I put one over on her? Aren’t I SUPERIOR?”
Blech blech blech on ALL of them!
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heh. Have decided to completely edit self and not post any of it.
Other than… ridiculous. And – not saying he didn’t cheat and getting into more of the mess [because it seems pretty clear now, right?], but “Alleged Mistress” – the media needs to take a step back and focus on something important.
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My .02 cents.
Some men are “players” and the rest aren’t. I can meet a guy for the first time and in five minutes know whether he is a player or not. Whether or not he is with his wife or significant other. Later my husband will say, “What did you think of so and so?” I tell him, “He’s a player. I didn’t like him.” My husband is shocked. “Really, he says. How do you know?” Then I go on to tell him why because bless his heart he is completely clueless.
Tiger Woods is obviously a player. He believes his own press and has from the beginning. I’m sure when his dad was alive he told him on a daily basis how great he was. “You can have anything, son. The sky’s the limit.” With the money and fame came the women and he couldn’t say no because he is weak and he was probably thinking, “Hey, I’m Tiger Woods. I can have anything I want.”
Now, the thing that I don’t understand about “players” is why get married in the first place? If they have no intention of being faithful why bother? Why marry a woman, have children with her and then cheat? He has put not only himself but his wife and kids, and extended families in a glaring, ugly spotlight. Ick. The hurt, embarassment, humiliation he has caused is enormous.
Maybe Tiger Woods had the affair or affairs simply because he could. The women were there, they were willing and available. These women along with Tiger have loose if non-existent morals like ducks, who are very indiscreet. Maybe the women want to brag that they have had sex with someone famous. I also think that dollar signs are in the equation. Especially if they should happen to get pregnant. They can sue, get a pile of money to support them and their “love child.” If they don’t get pregnant some will gladly accept a pay off for keeping their mouths shut. But some of them will go on to doing interviews on 20/20, Larry King and the like. It’s salacious stuff and they don’t really care. They want their fifteen minutes of fame. Maybe they hope they will be offered a book deal or their own reality show. Who knows. It’s sick.
When I see stuff like this on the news, I look at my husband and say, “Thank God, we have a normal life.”
Cher :snowguy:
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amen, Cher….The ladies on “The View’ (I hardly ever watch it anymore) were asking that one question…’why did he get married?” That seems to be the obvious one.
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And Leslie, you are right as well. In the back of these women’s minds they probably think maybe he will leave his wife for me. Then I can be Mrs. Tiger Woods. They obviously have low self esteem issues. That’s why they got involved in the first place. Wow, a married, famous man wants me. I have to go for it because someone stable and single never would.
Cher
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The ladie(s) in question probably thinks what a lot of mistress’s think – I’m special – I can change him – He’ll stay with me – He won’t do that to me – He loves me. Sometimes all you can do is shake your head and walk away.
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And yes, Carly, the diseases he could transfer. His poor wife would be having sex not just with her husband but with all of the women he’s had sex with. Yuck!!
Cher
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I’m inclined to think there are many times power issues involved in affairs – He (the cheater) wants it, she (the mistress) gives it to him.
I also agree with Cher, surely there are self-esteem issues involved for the mistress. Why would any self-respecting, confidant woman get involved with a man who has no more regard for her or his spouse than to cheat?
All that to say, it’s tragic – in or out of the public eye. Betrayal is betrayal and it wounds on any level. I just wish the media would drop it – there are so many other important things happening in the world.
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:freezeman: It is still cold here!
I’m sick to death of the Tiger Woods scandal and the way the media just keeps harping on any celebrity who does something wrong, think stupid! I’m also tired of hearing about Jon & Kate, do I care—no! I do feel sorry for the children involved in any of the sensationalism that the media feeds to us these days. We have to take some of the blame (or someone does) because someone out there wants the media poking their noses in where it doesn’t belong.
Thanks for letting us air our views.
What I don’t understand is why all these women would want to come forward admitting to becoming involved with a married man I don’t care how famous he is. I just don’t get it. Someone is failing our younger generation by not teaching them good morals & integrity. :*&#!: Are all those women really telling the truth?
On a lighter note: :santalights: :decor: :reindeer: :santaguy:
:hanstar: :Han1:
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You know, speaking of stupid media, maybe if we had a few more Edward R. Murrows and Walter Cronkites we’d have a few less idiots who crash White House State Dinners or pretend their child has blown away in a home-made flying saucer! All so they can get their 15 minutes of fame.
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I remember reading somewhere that married men were so attractive to single women because they’d proven they’ll make that commitment, marry a woman and have children with her. If you think about our biology, it makes a bit of sense. Some wires must be loose somewhere though for those women to ignore the fact that if he’s cheating on her, he’ll cheat on me.
Maybe each one of them deluded herself into thinking she’d be different!
Julie – I don’t think Tiger wanted to “feel” like a god. He thinks he already is one!
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I believe they want their 15 minutes in the spotlight.
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Argh! I hate when I start to read something, get distracted…ooh! Squirrel!…and forget to come back and finish.
I’ve known some celebrities in my life, good friends with some of them. Most get over the “I’m Special” syndrome and live happy lives with the spouse of their choice. Some never marry because they want to play the field. Others? They never grow up. Which is sad and terribly unfair to the woman/man they’ve married. Oh yeah, I know some women who are just as bad as the men when it comes to fooling around.
As for the mistresses/lovers? Just remember–what goes around comes around. Sooner or later.
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OOOH! Just remembered, this whole conversation puts me in mind of the new Meryl Streep/Alec Baldwin/Steve Martin movie coming out soon. It looks wonderful–about a middle aged woman dumped by her hubby, who married the young woman he was fooling around with. Then starts an affair with his first wife behind wife #2’s back!
Talk about what goes around coming around!
Looks really good.
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Both the cheater and the mistress are usually such deluded characters! They
both think they can beat the odds! They can and will do what they want AND
get away with it! Their thoughts are only for themselves, not anyone else,
least of all the spouse and children. Why do the cheaters marry? Could it be a form of protection? Or perhaps someone to fill in between mistresses? What-
ever it is, they will always be around and about in their deluded state!!!
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I don’t get it either. It’s not like they can say “I didn’t know he was married”.
I think Tiger is a nice looking guy but if these women met him as a regular married man in a social setting they wouldn’t be chasing him. Does he not get that? My biggest shock was that Tiger was shocked that this would be big news!!
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All I have to say is that I’m rooting for Team Elin. I think she should divorce him, take the kids, and start a new life with someone who will be a REAL man and husband to her. I’ll be so disappointed if she takes the extra money Tiger offers her to stay married to him. That kind of misery doesn’t have a price, IMO.
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I don’t understand it all either. I try not to watch too much of this stuff, so what I read here today gave me the updates on what’s going on. I really never understood the idea fo cheating either. All I know is that I don’t want to be on the receiving end of a situation like that, nor do I want to be the cause of the breakup of anyone’s marriage. That’s all about what I can add to this discussion. Very diverse and interesting perspectives here.
Peace and love,
Paula R.
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Actually, I haven’t paid much attention either. Other than hitting the fire hydrant, he didn’t do anything illegal and I just plain don’t care. I’m tired of all the crap that the media focuses on as important. The same was with Jon and Kate, the same with Michael Jackson. I swear that a day doesn’t go by that he isn’t mentioned on something.
The only reason it is news is because he is Tiger Woods- the same kid who never really was a kid- not that that is an excuse- but so much of the media and public like to see the famous fall. And they like to see it done spectacularly. I don’t play into it any more. I don’t click news links about it. I don’t buy the magazines and I don’t watch the TV gossip shows. I have more important things in my life to worry about than some guy who cheated on his wife (yeah, he’s an idiot) and the bimbos that he cheated with (they’re bigger idiots). I also, to be honest, find it pathetic and reprehensible that his wife is willing to stay with him for Xnumber of years for XX number of dollars. Why she doesn’t have enough pride to leave now, instead of when the dollar amount is right, boggles my mind. In some states that could almost be prostitution- but legal.
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I like the whole thing is getting toooo mmuucchh press. I just feel bad for the kids, they have no say in the whole situation. Even the wife has a chose either stay or leave. The poor kids have no choice.
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I have a different perspective. Some wealthy, powerful people think that they can have everything due to their wealth and power. Tiger thought that he was in complete control of his relationship due to the pre-nup and his wealth. Even without cheating on his wife, this attitude is so demeaning; Furthermore, it robs the marriage any opportunity to be a true partnership. Of course, Tiger took it even further. In his mind, his power and money meant that he could do what he wanted. This is not the behavior of a responsible adult. Honestly, if he is this controlling, the sanest thing his wife could do is leave him.
In my experience, most of the women involved with a married man are completely delusional. They convinced themselves that they have a unique and committed relationship. They are always shocked when the men turn out to liars and cheats.
People , who cheat on their spouses (believe me women cheat too), do not respect their partner or their marriage.
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One word – SELFISH. People who think only about what they want – and there’s a lot of them out there (especially the male species) – and if you have money (control) there’s nothing to stop them!