I have a dog and a cat, and they both keep life interesting around my house, in their own ways. They each have their own distinct quirks and personalities, but there are just some things that truly separate who and what cats are (those of you who have cats know what I’m talking about!) compared to the easy-going, I-want-to-please-you personality of most dogs. I came across this humorous run-down of how to give a cat a pill, and how to give a dog a pill. The results couldn’t be more true, and I hope you all laugh as much as I did while reading this.
How to give the cat a pill 
Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat’s mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.
Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process. 
Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away. 
Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.
Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. 
Call spouse from garden.
Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat’s throat vigorously.
Retrieve cat from curtain rail 
and get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.
Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.
Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink glass of water to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse’s forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap. 
Retrieve cat from neighbor’s shed. Get another pill. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.
Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus jab. Throw Tee-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.
Ring fire brigade to retrieve cat from tree across the road. 
Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil-wrap.
Tie cat’s front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of fillet steak. Hold head vertically and pour 2 pints of water down throat to wash pill down.
Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. 
Call furniture shop on way home to order new table.
Arrange for SPCA to collect cat and ring local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters. 
How to give the dog a pill 
Wrap it in bacon. 
If you’re a dog and cat owner, what other differences stand out to you?
Janelle Denison finds it hard to believe that it’s been nearly 20 years since she first started writing romance novels. At first, it was a way to pass idle time while her husband worked swing shift, but before long it became an obsession to get published. Luckily, she kept at it (it took her over 5 years to get that first book published!) and is now a Waldenbooks, Barnes & Noble, and USA Today Bestselling author! Now, after selling over 40 plus novels, she finds that her Plotmonkey pals help to keep her stories fresh and unique, and she can’t imagine writing a story without their input. Janelle lives in Oregon with her husband, Don, along with two teenage daughters that keep life interesting.
3 Seductions and a Wedding
Hot Number
Play With Me
Wild For Him
Subscribe to Posts 
Well, cats don’t eat other animals’ poop or roll in the stinkiest substances possible. LOL.
I grew up with dogs and horses, wasn’t a “cat person” until I adopted my first cat in April 2001. I have three now and I’ve learned what it is to live a life of servitude. :-D
Actually, one of my cats can’t be pilled at all — three vets have tried without success and trust me, I’m not going to. Of course, today they have pill pockets for the food-motivated cats (which she isn’t) and trans dermal meds, injections instead of pills (antibiotics, for instance), etc. So it’s a bit easier, relatively speaking.
Goodness! We have one cat Cookie aka Cookie Monster, who’s not the best at any human contact. The vet staff have to muzzle her and where think leather gloves to handle her. It’s bad.
The other two cats are generally cooperative in the the med taking category. :)
Our dogs, 2 very large yellow labs, are just puppies at heart and have no sense of self. They knock down, or plow through, anything within a 3 foot radius to them. It’s funny.
:)
they “wear” “thick” gloves….geesh. I’m still working on my first cup of coffee this am….
Growing up we had both, but I think I am a ‘dog person’, now. We just have to get one.
I might never stop giggling. SO TRUE!
Too funny! I’ve only had one cat in my life and she was a sweetheart. She LOVED having a bath if you can believe it. Never had to give her a pill though.
If Spike needs a pill, which he does everyday, I wrap it in a piece of cheese. No worries.
Cher :fallleaf:
Thanks for the laugh! I guess I’m more of a dog person. Had both cats and dogs growing up, but I am highly allergic to cats, so can’t have one now. Of course, every cat for 5 miles loves me…I think they just know when you don’t need to be around them.
Loved this post. I really needed to laugh. Am now the 4th person in family to get stomach flu-while already havin a sinus infection. *sigh*
I’ve never had a cat (although, I am about to move in with one), but that definitely sounds like my dog. We wrap the pill in cheese also, but now that’s her clue that she’s getting a pill so she gets resistant sometimes.
Hope everyone is avoiding the colds going around!
<3 J
I don’t have a cat – so I can’t comment on that – Wrap my dog’s pill in cheese – NO PROBLEM!!!
Our dogs spit it out of the cheese or ham that we give them… for both our cat and dogs, we have to smash the pills and place them in their wet dog/cat food…
Cats pretend to like you. At least until you feed them.
Dogs love you all the time.
Watching my 10 pound cat bully my Newfoundland dogs?
She *pwns* them completely!
I’m headed to FL tomorrow so will likely be scarce! Will try to stay up with the posts, if not comments.
Who said you could go to FL without me???
:dogrun: So true oh so so true. Cats the brainboxes of the animal world…and dogs?…not. Take care. Caroline x
I am a dog person all the way. It’s tough, because Bruce always loved cats, and I tried to make myself into a cat person, but it just didn’t work. Our two experiments with cat ownership failed miserably.
We are now in our 9th year of having a dog as a member of our family, and honestly couldn’t imagine life without her. (Or without the little hyper brat we brought home 2 years ago!)
PS: Caroline, I agree:
Cats are the brainboxes.
Dogs are the hearts.
I don’t have any pets these days but I do pet/house sitting for three couples so I get my pet fix! :dogrun: The pets I am currently taking care of are 1 dog of very mixed breed & two cats that spend a great deal of time sleeping!
The dog used to take a two pills daily, you just concealed them in peanut butter & he always took them without problems. Another dog that I take care that is growing older has to have some medication daily that is in a syringe, he is pretty good about it. It is not a shot, you just squirt the meds into his mouth & he swallows. 
I have both cats & dogs which are very different animals!! 
Thank heavens I’ve never had to give a cat a pill! Great funny!! 
:fallleaf:
We may get a bit of rain! Tea!! 
Whoops! That is a typo, should be “yea!!!! ”
:fallleaf:
Loved it!! I laughed my a** off reading that! Cheese works good too for dogs. Mine are cheese junkies! I swear they can hear the plastic rattle on a piece of sliced cheese and damn near beat you to the kitchen..
We just rescued a kitten 3 weeks ago- and trying to give her liquid anitbiotics was amusing! How you get all that fight into a 1.25 lb kitten is beyond me! Our other 3 cats are all big (15-20 lbs) so giving them stuff when needed is not easy. We have one very anti-social cat of the bunch and there are some members of the family who have never seen her.
Our 3 dogs are all amsuing in so many ways. The kitten has no problems “attacking” them and wrestling with them. Cant’ wait to see what she does when she gets bigger. She is now up to 3lbs and never stops. The dogs get cheese every morning and evening, two of them get it with pills and the 3rd one is in training in case he has to. Makes it easy. We just yell “cheese time!” and they are right there for it and their treats after.
I love my animals!
This is too funny!!!…and too true!!! I’ve had the experience before of administering pills to my kitties and once to a very large French Lop rabbit. The cats are much more difficult to deal with.
Thankfully, I didn’t have to give up and trade my babies in for hamsters though…which I’ve also had before, too, along with chinchillas, gerbils, mice, rats, dogs, more rabbits, guniea pigs…I forget the rest…:>
Yep! I’m an animal lover…especially cats!