And now we’re stuffed pigs with lots of stories to write! 
So a few jokes to get you through until we’re back to normal next week!
BORN TO BE WILD
Working people frequently ask retired people what they do to make their days interesting.
Well, for example, the other day my wife and I went into town and went into a shop.
We were only in there for about 5 minutes. When we came out, there was a cop writing out a parking ticket.
We went up to him and said, ‘Come on man, how about giving a senior citizen a break?’ He ignored us and continued writing the ticket, so I called him a Nazi.
He glared at me and started writing another ticket for having worn tires.
So my wife called him a shit-head.
He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first.
Then he started writing a third ticket. This went on for about 20 minutes.
The more we abused him, the more tickets he wrote.
Personally, we didn’t care.
We came into town by bus, but we try to have a little fun each day now that we’re retired.
#
And now for the Quote of the day:
‘Whatever you give a woman, she will make greater. If you give her sperm, she’ll give you a baby.
If you give her a house, she’ll give you a home. If you give her groceries, she’ll give you a meal.
If you give her a smile, she’ll give you her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her.
So, if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of shit.’
:danmonk
Carly Phillips would like to take 100% credit for all her stories but the truth is, Carly’s strength is writing family, emotion, funky elderly people and animals. She couldn’t plot her way out of a paper bag, which is why she smartly found her plotmonkey pals early on in her writing career. Thanks to their support, Carly is now a NYT Bestselling author of 23 plus novels. Because writing doesn’t keep her busy enough, Carly is also a wife, a mother of one preteen and one teenage daughter, the primary care giver of her soft coated Wheaten terrier and an expert carpool mom.
Destiny
Dirty Little Secrets
Once Upon A Valentine
Through The Night
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Thanks for the chuckle especially the first one. :giggler
Glad to hear everyone is safely back home with books they can’t wait to write.
Have a great day all,
Cher
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Good morning and Happy Birthday to my son in law, Jack.
It is snowing here in NY and supposed to be brutally cold. BRRRR. I wish I could stay home on the couch under a blanket with one of many tbrs.
Stay safe and warm everyone. Maybe this icon will warm me ….. :flamer:
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Pat- I refuse to look out the window. It’s bad enough the dogs want me to play doorman all day long so they can go play and then warm up and then go out and play and then warm up and….
:freezin I’m with you on the blanket thing.
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Glad you all had fun together!
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So sorry to everyone who’s fighting the cold. I’m visiting my mom in Arizona this week and I hadn’t even been paying attention to the weather! Looks like I picked a good week to be gone (although my “cold” isn’t nearly as bad as a lot of y’all’s “cold.”)
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Thanks for the day brighteners. Love the quote.
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Carly those were really funny helps the day along. It is so cold here today it is -13 and feels like -50 I don’t want to be outside for 2 minutes bummer I had to get to work today. The car really didn’t even want to turn over and I keep it in the garage.
Oh I have to tell you I finally got your book I had to order it, you know that is okay but it really steams me that they don’t seem to carry your books here in this part of the world.. I think all the stores should carry your books they are the best… What is wrong with them even our Wal-mart don’t have them.
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Great jokes! :giggler It is snowing here too and it hasn’t gotten to 10 degrees since Monday. :freezin
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Too Funny!!!!
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Carly, love the “retired” funny. I’m retired & it seems I am to busy sometimes! :wink: This has been one of those busy weeks!!
To all of those enduring freezing, miserable weather–here on the opposite side of the country we have been breaking record highs all week!! Monday was 84, it certainly was hard to imagine that it was the middle of January. It has really been to warm for this time of year. As I keep saying we need :rain! Just not all at once, please.
Please be careful in all that nasty weather. Stay home to read if you can, it is safer that way.
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LOL! Thanks for the laughs today and happy writing!!
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Hey Everyone, Carly is featured on Writerspace website today as a new author to their line up. There is also a blurb about the reissue of Secret Fantasy. Yea Carly!
I just wanted to share that with those of you that might not know! 
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Thanks, Donna!
Ev, I hear you on playing doorman in the cold for the dogs, LOL!
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Logging in late. Loved the funnies, Carly and I saw the Writers Space! Awesome blossom. Alannah, glad to hear from you…was staring to worry that you’d been hijacked or something. Since I’m in Florida and the dogs are in Oklahoma, the DH and DD have door duties, but Julie? What’s the deal? It’s :freezeman down here. What happened to the sun and warmth?
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I especially enjoyed that second one!!!!