Well after all the thrills and excitement in San Francisco, I had fully expected to be home with butt in chair and fingers on keyboard this week, diving back into my writing with all the excitement and energy I always experience after nationals. Instead, as you read this, I’ll be in Florida, attending the funeral of someone I love very much.
My aunt, Harriet Day, passed away on Tuesday about a month shy of reaching her 93rd birthday.
Her life was much too enormous to ever sum up here. I will, however, offer this link, if you’d like to read more about her. A lawyer when women didn’t even go to college, a world-traveling diplomat who interacted with the likes of Mother Teresa, a social crusader who campaigned for civil rights in the south in the 60’s. Well…see for yourself (and be sure to check out the video on the upper right corner of the screen. The final woman who speaks is Congresswoman Corrine Brown.)
My sister is putting together a small booklet of memories to give to my cousin, and asked me and each of my siblings to contribute. Our task was to find a single word to sum up what our Aunt Harriet meant to us.
I thought you might enjoy it. And I ask you to spare a thought today for this incredible lady who set a shining example of what a woman could be if she worked hard enough, even against the most extreme obstacles. A woman who truly did set me on the path to becoming the writer I am today.
Thanks. Back to my irreverent, opinionated self next week.
Leslie
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Trying to sum up a woman as glorious as Aunt Harriet in one single word is like trying to convey the magnificence of a sunset by calling it pretty. It is an impossible task.
You could call her brilliant. Of that there can be no doubt.
You could say she was determined. For she most certainly was.
Gifted, forthright, eloquent, beautiful and just. Yes, all of the above.
She would also have to be called wickedly irreverent at times, blessed with a quick sense of humor and a quicker wit. The soft bellow of her spontaneous laughter so often inspired by—and joined by—my own mother’s, is a sound I will hear in my mind for the rest of my life.
Funny, quirky, outrageous, stubborn. All appropriate.
But none of those words touch on her kindness. On her gentle nature. On the sweet maternal instinct that I experienced during one long summer drive from Maryland to Florida, when I rested my head on her lap, hour after hour, feeling the tender stroke of her fingers in my hair and on my cheek.
They don’t convey the genuine satisfaction I saw in her eyes when I was twelve years old and was invited to speak at the retirement ceremony of my favorite sixth grade teacher. At the height of desegregation in the seventies, Harriet truly shone with accomplishment and pride that I, her little blond-haired niece, could be invited to speak before a packed church of mixed races, honoring an African American teacher with whom I’d built such a strong bond. This a mere decade after the battles she’d waged against racism and intolerance in the city she had grown to love.
I’d made her proud…but just as importantly, the city itself had made her proud.
There are truly so many descriptions, so many adjectives to depict a single life. But I think when I filter the possibilities through my own emotions and my own memories and try to come up with the a word to describe how Aunt Harriet most affected me, personally, it would have to be this:
Words.
She gave me words. She gave me language. When I was nine, she put Jane Eyre into my hands. While my friends were reading about the Bobbsey Twins, I spent my elementary years lost in the pages of The Red Badge of Courage and Great Expectations, Brave New World and all the other great works of literature. Each of them was like a treasure chest opened in front of me, filled with words she wanted me to read and know and, most importantly, appreciate. An appreciation for the written word, she often told me as she quizzed me on what I had read, was the absolute foundation for any educated person and gave life richness and flavor.
The written word became my overriding pleasure. And eventually, my professional medium. Considering she weaned me off Nancy Drew and onto Charles Dickens before the age of ten, I wondered how Aunt Harriet would feel about me becoming a successful author of what some consider the pulpiest of fiction. But I shouldn’t have wondered. Shouldn’t have had a moment’s doubt. Because she was as proud of me then as she had been on that day when I was twelve and she saw proof of the racial changes in her city. She told me so, many times.
I know that before we lost my Uncle Ray, he was given a mission whenever I had a new book out. Aunt Harriet would send him off to the store, and I can picture him now, shopping in the romance section, standing out with that beautiful white hair. And I sometimes picture Harriet with him, searching just as avidly, pride gleaming in her eyes as she told anyone who would listen that her niece had written that book, as if I’d authored the next Tale of Two Cities, rather than a tale of a guy and a girl falling in love. That mental picture gives me an inordinate amount of pride in what I have done with my own life—which was largely due to her.
I will never forget the genuine delight in her voice when she called to thank me for dedicating a book to her, even though her eyesight was too poor for her to actually read it herself. It broke my heart, this woman of such vision and such appreciation for the written word being unable to see them very well anymore. But despite the weakness in her eyes, I have no doubt that through her spirit and her brilliance, she still saw the world with more clarity than most people will ever see it in their lifetimes.
She was my teacher in my childhood. She has been my muse in my adult life. She was even the basis of a character in some of my stories…a character readers have told me again and again how much they loved and wished they could know in real life.
I was lucky. I did know her in real life. And for that, I am entirely blessed.
Harriet Marie Smith Day
September 10, 1915 – August 5, 2008
Note: This picture was taken within recent years, when she was well into her 80′s. The last time I saw her before she got sick, she was wearing black leather pants, cat’s eye sunglasses and a leopard spotted blouse. Unique and magnificent to the very end.
Leslie Kelly used to say she wanted to be a doctor when she grew up, but then she discovered Nancy Drew books. Being a flashlight-under-the-covers-nose-in-book reader throughout her childhood, she couldn’t think of anything else she’d rather do as an adult than continue to lose herself in fictional stories. Her real life marriage of 20 years to the man of her dreams is a constant reinforcement that happily-ever-afters really can happen…and that they’re worth writing about. Living in Maryland, Leslie spends her non-writing time laughing a lot with the above-mentioned romance hero and their three daughters. Though an author of more than thirty sexy, contemporary comedies, she has recently branched out to write dark romantic suspense under the pseudonym Leslie Parrish.
Destiny
Dirty Little Secrets
Once Upon A Valentine
Through The Night
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What a beautiful, beautiful tribute, Leslie. Your post has brought tears to my eyes. I’m so glad you had your aunt, and for as long as you did. She sounds like such an incredible woman, one whose spirit will continue on. Thank you for sharing her with us. {{{hugs}}}}
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What an amazing tribute, Leslie. She sounds like an incredible lady who will be sorely missed. Blessings to you and your family as you mourn her loss.
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Your Aunt Harriet looks and sounds like she was one of those amazing people that were beautiful inside and out. Thank you for sharing a little of her with us. My sympathies to you and your family on your loss, Leslie.
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Leslie~
I am so sorry that you have lost someone so very special. Your loving tribute brought tears to my eyes. Heaven is a far richer place with your Aunt among the angels.
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Leslie,
Saying I’m sorry seems almost unnecessary because your aunt lived such an extraordinary, exemplary and fulfilling life. She left you a legacy of hopeful humanitarian goodness and love that you are no doubt passing down to your children. Amidst so much bad news which we are bombarded with on a daily basis it’s so nice to hear about the good that at least one person has done and the ripple effect it generated.
Your tribute to her touched my heart as did the video and the newspaper report. She was quite beautiful even into later years wasn’t she. What a woman!
Cher
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What a beautiful tribute and what sounds like an amazing woman. My thoughts and prayers go to her family and yours.
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Leslie, my thoughts and prayers are with you and all your family. The tribute you wrote brought tears to my eyes. You and everyone that knew your aunt were blessed to have such a wonderful person in your lives. :hug2:
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Wow, that’s the only word that comes to my mind right now. I remember your blog from several months ago when you talked about all the good teenagers are doing, and you listed several of your family members. I guess we know where they’ve gotten some of their inspiration. What a fascinating lady and what a wonderful and rich life she led (and shared with her family).
Sending hugs and blessings to you and your family and thank you for sharing a little about this amazing woman with us! :hug2:
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Leslie, what a moving tribute. I’ll admit it, I cried.
To Harriet–
I wish I could have met her, though I feel like I’ve known her since you’ve been telling me stories about her for years.
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Leslie
How truly lucky and blessed you are to have had a pioneer like your Aunt Harriet to be your mentor the way she obviously was.
Celebrate her life with your family. She, and all of you, deserve it.
ev
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I’m so sorry for your loss. It’s wonderful to have people like your aunt in our lives; those who bless us with their presence and give us the inspiration we need to become the people they know we can be.
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Beautiful tribute Leslie, she sounded like an amazing woman. I hear a lot of people say it’s the mark you leave behind when you leave this world that marks the biggest success of a person’s life. And your aunt definitely made her mark on so many people, touched so many lives. That is definitely a cause to be celebrated. People like that don’t come along every day, so feel blessed that such a woman was in your life. There is always a sadness that grips you, when someone so special leaves this world. We become selfish, always wanting them to be near, to shed that wonderful light they have on us for always. Living as long as she did, and being the kind of person she was, it’s one of the most awesome blessings there is. I am sorry for your loss, but I promise you she’s still here, loving and guiding all those dear to her heart, even though you can no longer see her. God bless her.
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Leslie…I am so sorry for your loss. She sounds like an amazing woman…. :hug2: :hug2:
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Leslie,
What an amazing gift you have given with this insight into your family. I am so sorry for your loss. We too have faced family and friends passing this week, and I must admit I envy your way with words in this time of grieving. There is now another angel above, keeping watch over you. God Bless you and safe travels. :heart1:
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Leslie, what an incredible woman your aunt was and I’m glad you and your family have such fabulous memories to celebrate her life.
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What an amazing tribute for an even more amazing woman.
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Leslie, I’m so sorry to hear about your loss. That was a lovely tribute, your aunt sounds like a truely amazing woman. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family during this difficult time.
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What a beautiful tribute to your beloved aunt. My thoughts and prayers are with you and all who were touched by her during her life.
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Sorry for your loss Leslie, but she did live a great life…. just remember all of the good times you had with her
Donna
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A beautiful tribute to a beautiful lady.
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Leslie,
I am so sorry for your loss but you must feel truly blesed to have had such a wonderful woman in your life. The best tribute you can make to your aunt is to live your life by her example.
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Beautiful tribute! Brought tears to my eyes. What an awesome woman.
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Wonderful tribute, Leslie.
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Leslie, I’m sorry for your loss. What a wonderful tribute.
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My condolences on the loss of your lovely aunt! I use the word lovely, because
she obviously was an attractive person who was also lovely as a person. My
thoughts and prayers are also sent along to your family.
Pat Cochran
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Your aunt sounds wonderful. I am so sorry for your lost.
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Leslie,
What a beautiful tribute to your Aunt.
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family
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Wow, what a tribute to an extraordinary person. I’m sorry for your loss :hug2:
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Leslie, sorry to hear about your aunt. She sounds like she was a fabulous lady.
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That was beautiful and moving. Thank you for sharing.
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I am so sorry for your loss. How lucky you were to have such a special person in your life.
My Dad passed away 3 weeks ago and I remember him every day. May our memories give us and everyone who has lost someone special comfort.
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that is nice to hear. so sorry about your loss.
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Leslie, how blessed you have been to have had such a wonderful person in your life. She has helped to make you the special person you are. Your tribute was so well written that I know what a very extraordinary person she was. Thanks for sharing her with us. My sympathies to you and your family.
Take care,
Donna M
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What an amazing woman! Thank you for sharing her with us. I watched the video and it made me smile at the very end where it showed her and her husband sitting in rocking chairs all smiles. You can just tell by looking at them that they were wonderful people with big hearts. Now they are together again and probably doing great things in heaven! God bless you Leslie! :heart1: :flower4you:
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Pat, I’m so sorry to hear about the loss of your Dad. Losing a parent is among the worst things you ever have to go through in this life…big hugs to you and your family.
I am still in Florida. The funeral was utterly amazing. I left feeling uplifted and wanting to cheer rather than sobbing and depressed as I’ve done at every other funeral in my life. There’s a snippet of it on this website:
http://www.firstcoastnews.com/news/topstories/news-article.aspx?storyid=116200&catid=15
Thanks so much everyone for your thoughts and well wishes!