Okay, so my surgery is over and I’m the road to recovery. I’ve learned a few things about myself that I thought I might share with you.
1) I really do have a low pain tolerance.
According to the post-op nurse, it took 3 times the amount of drugs to settle me down once I woke up from the anesthesia. I don’t remember much. I vaguely recall waking up and screaming, but I don’t remember the pain. But it must have been pretty bad. The nurse actually went and talked to my husband and father who were waiting outside. Huh. Maybe people will learn to start taking me seriously. I do know my body. I’ve lived in it for 43 years. I wish I had more stamina for pain, but I don’t. That’s what modern pharmaceuticals are for, right?
2) I’m a better housekeeper than I thought I was.
Nothing teaches you how good of a housekeeper you are until you can’t do anything anymore. Suddenly, you have to watch the kitchen that you spent twelve years saving money for and a full year planning and another three months to put together PRECISELY the way you want it go to pot. Okay, it wasn’t quite as bad as that, but it’s hard to EXPLAIN where things go or precisely how to puzzle my pans together so they all fit into the drawer. I spent this week (with my daughter’s help) getting most of it organized to my liking.
Let’s not even talk about laundry or bathrooms. I’m so fortunate that my mother sent over her housekeeper every week. That’s a treat in and of itself.
3) Restaurant take-out is not as good as my cooking.
I hate this fact more than any other. I had this fantasy of getting take-out from every restaurant in the neighborhood and enjoying not having to cook (or clean) for weeks on end. Then I remembered that I live with the two pickiest eaters in the universe. My husband wants no un-healthy food. My daughter wants nothing that might, you know, make her grow up slim and strong (since she’s doing that with the high-carb foods she loves so dearly.) So my choices became very limited. Trust me, guys, I was cooking weeks ago. Takes me hours and I take lots of breaks, but I still cook. As I type this, I’m making Chicken Marsala. I started around 3pm. It’s now 8:30pm and we’re still not ready to eat (though part of that is not my fault–I’m NOT doing the grocery shopping, so ingredients get missed!)
I will say, though…Carrabas does the best carry-out. Somehow, their food stays the hottest and is packaged best. Outback fails big time. Except for their onion soup. I might not have made it through this without Outback’s onion soup…oh, and angel food smoothies from Smoothie King!
Still, I’m pretty much salivating the idea of EATING OUT. Not the eating part as much as the OUT part!
4) Television is both boring and a life-saver.
I had fantasies (and large bills from Amazon) based on all the books I planned to read during my convalescence. Unfortunately, the painkillers I was given resulted in my attention span dropping to that of a gnat. I read magazines, but went through those in a day. I read a totally of two books over the last two weeks! Diana Peterfreund’s RIGHTS OF SPRING (BREAK) and Julie Kenner’s DEJA DEMON. Both were just what the doctor’s ordered–short chapters, lots of dialogue, super-quick pacing. Trade paperback so they looked thinner than they actually were! Trust me, it helped. I looked at a lot of thick paperbacks and I couldn’t deal. Weird.
I also couldn’t watch movies. I watched two. THE WATER HORSE, which I watched in two parts with my daughter (cute, but had a lot of backstory missing, IMO) and THE BUCKET LIST, which I found entirely overrated until the end.
Otherwise, I watched television. Lots and lots of television. I can now train an unruly dog (courtesy of THE DOG WHISPERER and IT’S ME OR THE DOG), plan a wedding (WHOSE WEDDING IS IT ANYWAY?, PLALTINUM WEDDINGS…even BRIDEZILLAS!), and become a stylist (WHAT NOT TO WEAR and HOW DO I LOOK?) But I have to confess…I had to change the batteries in the remote TWICE since my surgery. Apparently, I’ve taken channel surfing to a new level. That’s what happens when everything bores you!
Let me tell you about stir craziness…
…on second thought, let’s not!
I’m a week off all painkillers and I’m finally back to writing. It’s very exciting. I’m also resting a lot, which means more television (I’m now rediscovering the episodes of STAR TREK: VOYAGER that I missed when it originally ran) and luckily, more reading! I have a stack here…Isabel Sharpe’s AS GOOD AS IT GOT, Roxanne St. Claire’s THEN YOU HIDE and Alisa Valdes Rodriguez’s DIRTY GIRLS ON TOP, among many others. Not to mention the manuscript for Leslie’s upcoming romantic thriller!
I know I learned more things about myself, but I think you’ve all learned enough about my weaknesses and healing…needless to say, I’m on the mend and getting stronger every day. I still can’t drive (tried Monday…it was an unmitigated disaster…I drove okay, but afterwards was so weak, I could hardly make it back inside the house) and I still have to take it easier than I’d like (there will be no new clothes for San Francisco unless I ordered it online!)
So, have you ever had a long recovery? How did you handle it? How did you celebrate your recovery?
By all reports, Julie Leto was a sweet child once, somewhat shy, preferring to play quietly in her room making up stories. However, being raised with three brothers in a loud, primarily Italian household did have its influences and Julie discovered her inner tough girl. That’s probably why most of her heroines kick serious butt. Writing sassy heroines has worked out, as she’s sold nearly thirty books to three publishers featuring strong, confident women. Julie lives in Florida with her husband, daughter, spoiled dachshund, enormous guinea pig and a wide range of relatives all within driving distance.
ANOTHER WILD WEDDING NIGHT
Hard to Hold
Love Me If You Dare
Wild For Him
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Yay Julie you’re back to the land of the living! I’m so sorry to hear it’s not been easy, but you seem to be doing pretty great. I have a very low tolerance for pain, so I’m shuddering at the thought of what you’ve been through.
Thankfully I’ve never been through a long illness/recovery, so I cannot really relate, but my sympathies are with you. It’s exciting for us that you’re writing again. Can’t wait to see ya in San Fran!
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Julie, good to hear you’re on the road to recovery. Your strength will come back but it does take time. I’ve been through two long recoveries. The first time I was 24 and it was very humbling, and frustrating, to go from active, physically fit 24 year old to not being able to feed myself in the space of a heartbeat. I was a bank teller and was shot in the chest when our bank guard dropped (yes, I said DROPPED) his gun. The physical recovery was 10 weeks, the psychological recovery took much longer. I was 48 when I had my hysterectomy. It took the entire six weeks for me to recover but I followed my doctor’s instructions to the letter and once I hit that magical six week mark I seemed to gain stamina very quickly. Like you, I spent the majority of my time sleeping and channel surfing. Amazing what you can find on daytime TV. :yikes:
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So glad you are back online Julie- we missed you!!
I just went back to work since I had my hysterectomy the end of March. I am still tired by the end of the day, and last week, the first week back, I crashed and burned when I got home Friday night. On the other hand, I have no problem going out and mowing the lawns or doing my gardening. Go figure. I just don’t think I want to be at work. Which is where I have to go now.
I didn’t get much reading done or movies watched either. The inactvity of either just put me to sleep. Which really sucked.
Hugs
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Julie it’s great to hear you’re recovering well. I have to agree with what you said. I was diagnosed with a brain tumor. From the moment that phone call came, my whole life turned 180 degrees. I was awake during the operation so didn’t have to come out of high levels of anesthesia but it was an experience. My recovery was 3 months. About one month after the surgery, I was feeling very ill (dizzy, nausea, slurring words). Ended up I got an infection and was put back in the hospital another week. Thank God the meds worked and I didn’t have to go through another surgery. But that was a life-changing experience. Now I give in to my pain. I used to fight it and tell myself I’m bigger than my pain. But now even though I still get my migraines, I do not fight. I find that my house can be dirty another day or two, the laundry may be a few more loads, and maybe we’ll eat grilled cheese AGAIN, but allowing myself the time to get better is priority. Hope you continue to feel great!
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Julie, so glad your recovery is going so well. At least you’re off pain meds now and your brain isn’t fuzzy and you can get back to writing. Which is great for people like me who love to ead your books! :-)
My longest recovery actually started before my daughter was born. I had pre-eclampsia and spent weeks in bed before she was born unable to do anything but take a shower and go to the bathroom. I could do nothing else. It was awful. Then after she was born–I had a C-section–it took forever to get my energy back but at least I was able to actually move around and do stuff at that point. Two days after the C-section I contracted a Staph infection and had to have IV antibiotics for 14 days. I had to hook myself up to a bag every 8 hours at home and have a visiting nurse come to the house to change out the IV site every couple of days.
Lilly in the meantime was in the neonatal unit at the hospital so I would go down every day to see her. She was in for 3 weeks but it seemed like 3 months. She weighed only 3 pounds so it was like holding a little doll. I was scared to death I would do something wrong and hurt her. In dealing with all of this the stress–I’d been holding it all in trying to be strong for my husband since the whole thing started–came pouring out. My husband could walk in the room and say, “Good Morning.” And I would start crying and say, “What’s so good about it?” I would also start crying over commercials on television like the old “Reach out and Touch Someone” ads. I felt like an idiot but all I could do was ride it out. My blood pressure was still spiking but my doctor assured me it would eventually settle down to normal. Which it did. I probably had post-partum depression but never said anything to my doctor–and I definitely should have. Then came trying to lose weight. I gained 40 pounds during my pregnancy and weighed in at a whopping 180 the day she was born. And after that, we discovered she had mild to moderate mental retardation. So having a baby was definitely the longest recovery I’ve ever had. And it has been a serious life lesson–nothing in this life is guaranteed. We do our best and take what God gives us. It’s what we do with what we get that counts.
As far as dealing with pain, I’ve had RA for 21 years and it has taught me some amazing coping skills. I have found I can endure just about anything both physically and emotionally. I pushed through the pain during the daytime, still trying to write and take care of my family. Although I must admit there were nights during the past years living with RA that I did ask God to please go ahead and take me because I thought my husband and daughter would be better off and I would for sure because the pain would be over. I could only sleep for two hours at the time then I would have to get up. But fortunately, the Almighty didn’t listen, a great new drug called Remicade was developed and I’m virtually pain free now.
In a way I’m glad for all the stuff that’s happened because it’s made me appreciate life even more. I’m so lucky and so blessed in so many ways.
Have a great day all,
Cher
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I had back surgery and discovered that during the first week I was a BIG baby. But after the initial pain, was amazed at my threshold for pain. I remember not being able to concentrate on a book or my writing. I had to take medicine for about 8 weeks and never wrote the entire time.
Continue luck on your recovery and happy travels on your trip to SF.
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I had to have an ovarian cyst removed 13 years ago. I couldn’t drive or work for over 3 weeks. I do heal rather quickly luckily, but I dread having surgery again. I have to have foot surgery in about 3 weeks. I know I’ll be off work for 2 weeks and can’t exercise or do much of anything for at least 6 weeks. The doctor also told me my foot could continue to swell for up to 3-6 months after the surgery. I won’t be able to wear a regular shoe until my foot stops swelling. I just hope I heal as fast this time as I did before.
Glad you are starting to feel up to getting around Julie.
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Juile I am so happy that you are up and getting back to yourself, it can be very hard to get there. I had surgery in 2001 my colon burst and they thought it was my appendix well my appendix was gone when the colon burst it took out the appendix. This all happened a couple days before 911 and I was stuck in the hospital 10 days they didn’t think I was going to make it becuase of the infection from it bursting. Well with me thinking I was going to die and then all going on in the world that was it was terrible. I was NOT in pain I was in so much pain before it burst that it felt so much better after but the nurses kept telling me to take pain meds I said why I don’t hurt and they make me feel crazy and I can’t walk with it all. I never did have much pain and was happy about that because the drugs were terrible I was allergic to two of them we found out the hard way. That was terrible.
But the hardest things for me was there was nothing on TV becuase of 911 I couldn’t watch all that stuff I just got way to depressed and we have cable with like 100 channels but nothing was on. I have a ton of tbr books but I could do that either just could sit still but if I got up to do something I would get so weak it was funny. I can’t believe it now but I talked the doctor into letting me go back to work after two weeks the doctor told me I was nuts but I told him if I had to stay home and listen to all the stuff on TV I might go nuts. I don’t know how we get through all this but some how we do. I should have another surgey like you but I am putting it off as long as I can.
I hope that it helps that you are going to SF so you have something to look forward too that will help.
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So glad you are on the mend, Julie!
I’m two weeks, two days post op myself. I had emergency gall bladder surgery. But I’m already feeling much better. Can finally be more productive around the house. I can also laugh, sneeze, or cough without crying. (Just a bit of wincing.) And no more pain meds!
And no more
That’s the best part!
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Julie, it’s good to hear that your recovery is progressing. I know that when my mom got her hysterectomy 5 years ago, it took her a while to be able to a lot of things. The thing she hated the worst was the restriction on playing with her grandkids. Six months after that she had her hip replaced. The recovery for that went much, much faster than the other and my parents and I were tromping around Ireland 4 months later.
I’ve never really had a recovery where I really had to take it easy. The worst things I’ve had would be the torn ligaments in my right ankle from playing volleyball (which had me wearing a boot for 3 or 4 weeks) and the time I had severe stomach pain (which they never found the cause for) that I had to work through because I had to give a presentation at the Air Force Academy for the MAA and take my last finals as an undergrad. It was a bit rough.
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Happy you are doing better… take it easy and time will pass!!! :flower4you:
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:wave: Hi Julie. Glad to here that you are on the mend.
The only times that I remember being grounded to home was when I was waiting on the birth of my girls. With both of my pregnancies I was confined to bed rest for 3 months. I remember having to lay on my left side 24/7. No much to do but eat, sleep, read and watch TV. Yahoo To bad that there was no lap top computers around then.
I have been very fortunate with all of my other recoveries, that I have been able to get back into the flow of things rather quickly.
Keep your chin up. You will be back to yourself in no time.
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It took me awhile to get back after having #3 (older boys were in school and hubby was not much help, he actually wanted me to cook…nope, don’t think so….my mom was a major help, though). I had a c-section with him and I guess I was just really tired (okay, maybe having three boys was also part of my problem…)
Last year, I had major anemia (I should actually not be alive, it was that bad, even after two pints of blood)….I was just really tired. I was on bed rest with #1 and actually I was ready to get out of bed! I used to live by “where in the world is Matt Lauer” and “the price is right” (so, do not ask about the last one).
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Glad you’re feeling better, Julie! I’ve only had to recover from getting my wisdom teeth pulled. That was bad, but not *real* surgery. I couldn’t eat for a week, and couldn’t eat real food for about a month – lost 15 lbs, my gums bled for about 4 weeks, and my cheeks bruised. Blech. Never again.
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I am blessed that I’ve had quick recoveries and I have a high pain tolerance. However, I’m right there with you on the pain meds! I HATE that brain-fuzzed feeling. I walk around wondering
the whole time. The last time I had to take some morphine, I was under a deadline for a technical article and attempted to write it while “under the influence.” Luckily, my husband “fixed” it but he saved the original so I could read it when I was clear-headed. 
All I could thing of was, “Duuude! What was the computer smokin’?” 
Needless to say, I’ve refused to take the heavy drugs every since!
Hang in there. Rest well, write well, and enjoy RWA! Yay for room service!
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Well, I can’t say that I have ever had a long recovery, but I know that I am going to have one in about a month…….I’m having my first baby. I had planned on reading the huge stack of hopefully interesting books, but I’ve noticed that short books are better for my shortening attention span. I need to look into that…….
Congrats on a good recovery so far….and hopefully you will continue on a healthful track!!!!
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Hey and so glad that you are back to writing, sounds like the downtime was pretty rough. I had a c-section and the funny thing was that before I went into labor I wanted to have it. It just sounded like a lot easier to go through and easier to recover from than a regular delivery. However, nobody told me that it would hurt like pure h*** !!! LOL I was in labor for 16 hours before they decided to do the c-section and guess they had decided that I didn’t need the antiseptic but when she made that first cut I screamed bloody murder!!! She said but it’s not supposed to hurt and I said trust me it did!!! They ended up having to put me under completely for the length of time to deliver her (which really freaked my husband out because we had all had a looooooooooong day).
So I completely understand the level of pain that you CANNOT take and hopefully the doctors will next time too. LOL
Missy
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Hi Julie, Glad to hear your on the road to recovery. About 16 years ago I was pregnant and put on bed rest for three weeks, I wasn’t in pain but was having complications that resulted in a miscarriage. I felt like it took months to recover, sort of just walked around in a fog. But I learned that I’m stronger then I ever imagined and time heals all wounds. Just listen to your body and take it slow.
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Julie I’m so glad you’re starting to feel better and I hope you’re 100% in two weeks!!
And PJ–SHOT? Oh my God, I can’t even imagine it! All these other nightmare stories are giving me shivers, too.
I actually have a very high pain threshold. I walked around with 2 herniated discs for two years, getting by with Motrin, until finally they hit my nerves and started to paralyze my leg. Then it was emergency spinal surgery. Not fun. But the worst part of that was the 11 day migraine I had after I went home, apparently caused by the anesthesia mixed with my pre surgical caffeine addiction!
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It’s good to see you back online Julie. You’ve been missed bunches!! It’s still going to take you a while to totally have your normal strenght and energy back, but each day it will be a bit better.
As far as SF goes, trust me on this one, don’t plan much of anything the first night, unless it’s much later and you’ve had time to take a nap. I know you’ll be sitting in a plane, but you will be tired when you arrive.
If you guys do get out to do any sightseeing, plan on taking cabs because you still won’t be able to walk for long distances without becoming very very tired.
The one thing I can promise you is in about six months (yes 6 of them) you will have a totally new lease on life and if you aren’t already, you will love it when you see a commerical for woman’s products, knowing you no longer need them.
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I’m so glad you’re feeling better! Channel your inner turtle…slow and steady wins the race. :-)
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I heal very fast and have a high pain tolerence–hence no long recoveries from 3 Caesareans, a hysterectomy, an a fusion of 2 vertebrae in my neck.
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Julie, so glad your recovery is coming along.
My longest recovery was 3 months in the hospital followed by 9 months in a rehab center after being in a car accident. I am luck to have a high threshold for pain! I watched soap operas while in bed and read books when I was able to sit in a wheelchair.
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Hugs, Julie! I had the same surgery only two days after Ronald Reagan died, so my recovery was spent watching a week of all Reagan on TV.
The surgery itself took 3 hours because of scar tissue left over from my 3 C-sections, which meant the uterus was stuck to the bladder so they had to be very carefully pried apart. They warned me beforehand that if the worst happened, I’d have to go home with a catheter and bag attached to me. Fortunately that didn’t happen!
:hug2:
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vicki- i gave all my stuff to my daughter. She gave me the finger!!
I love walking by the aisle and saying, Don’t need those. I get the finger again.
I think she has a problem with that finger.
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Hi Julie glad to hear you are doing better
I have had two surgeries in my life both c-sections but both took me time to recover I took for granted the ability to sit and stand I never realized the muscles in the stomach that you use to do that. With my son I tried to hard to recover and do things to fast because he was 4 weeks early and taken to another hospital I made myself do what I needed to to get released so I could go to the other hospital then I would walk from the emergency room to the nicu not fast. I ended up in the emergency room myself with an infection. I’m a huge baby when it comes to pain so I hopr to never have to have surgery again
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I’m thankful not to have any lengthy recoveries yet (*knocking on wood*)–glad to hear you’re back on your feet and on the go!
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Hi Julie,
I am so glad you are getting back to normal.
I seem to be able to tolerate pain pretty well. My recoveries have been from an appendectomy, 2 D & C’s (one in my early 20’s & the other about 8 years ago) and a breast biopsy. When I had the appendecotmy I was off work for about 6 weeks as that is the way it was then but I could easily have gone back to work earlier. Even when I went back I couldn’t lift anything heavy! I felt silly asking someone to lift some of the things that were no no’s from the doctor. However that might be one reason I did so well. Now they don’t seem to let people really recover from major surgeries & I think that it causes problems later down the line! Just my humble opinion. Keep taking it easy & do what the doctor says. You will appreciate your good health when you are fully recovered. :pray:
Cher, you have been through a lot. Can’t wait to meet you in SF.
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You know, perspective is a fabulous thing. When I complain about a little discomfort tomorrow, I’m going to think about PJ getting shot in the chest, Michelle’s brain tumor, Cher’s RA, etc. Seriously! It’s a testament to the strength of the women who comment here to read these amazing stories of recovery!
It’s funny…I had a c-section ten years ago (12 hours labor, but thankfully, no pushing before my daughter “distressed” and we had to rush into surgery.) I do NOT remember having trouble with pain, feeling like I couldn’t do anything, etc. Of course, all my concentration was on trying to pump enough breast milk to keep my child from starving. I guess when you have a baby, you focus on the baby and not yourself and I honestly did sleep when she slept as often as possible. Now that I’m older and really cannot nap during the day, that might hurt my ability to rejuvenate. I wish I could nap! It takes me forever to fall asleep, and once I do, if I don’t sleep for X amount of time (which changes) then I get horrible headaches. So I don’t nap. I’m the only plotmonkey who never naps!
But honestly, thank you all for the commiseration and well wishes. I am doing quite well for it only being 4 weeks. I’m taking it as easy as I can, but to be frank, writing again has made life tolerable again. I didn’t realize how much I missed it and I love this new story I’m working on! Watch the sidebar to see my progress!